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MAMA'S PRAYER TO BE ABLE TO EXPRESS THE LORD'S WORDS AND LOVE MORE CLEARLY!
--By Maria       Maria #247 DO 2964 1/95

              1. WHEN I TRY TO REACT to these beautiful prophecies that the Lord gives individuals or for specific situations, I'm at a loss for words to express the wonder of it. It certainly is a wonderful, precious, priceless gift to hear so directly from Jesus with such love and tenderness and understanding about every detail of our lives. It's overwhelming!
       2. I hate to even try to describe it, since when I do I make it sound so common and so paltry in comparison with what it really is, but that's my job, to try to express things. I feel that I could never begin to sufficiently express the wonder and beauty and love of the Lord. Even if I were gifted with eloquence above all other human eloquence, it still would fall far short of any ability to adequately describe it.
       3. I am praying for at least a little more of the gift of expressing these things, because I need to be able to pass on ideas more clearly, more powerfully and more persuasively. I need to be able to move people. I need to be able to make them feel God's forgiveness, His Spirit, His life. I need to be able to incite them to action, to arouse them to do something, to influence them for the good, to stir them to produce, to help them operate more scripturally, to motivate them to progress. And most of all, I need to show them God's love. I need to describe His tender care and compassion to them as I have seen it and experienced it through Dad and through those around me.
       4. I want so much to be able to do that. I want the Lord to help me to break through the barriers and obstacles that seem to hinder me. I'm sure when Moses said, "I am not eloquent" (Exo.4:10), he felt the same frustrations and impediments as I am feeling. There's so much to say, so much to express, but how do you do it? There's all of Heaven, all of the Spirit, but it's bottled up in a poor little vessel.
       5. (Mama crying:) Oh Lord, please help it to come out so I can do You justice--just a little bit, at least. I don't know why You didn't pick someone better able to express themselves. Even then, no matter how wonderful that would be, it still wouldn't even begin to come anywhere near expressing what You are and what You mean and what You do. At least it would be better, but as it is, not only do I not have any natural eloquence, but I'm hindered by obstacles and blockages and obstructions to even what I should normally be able to say in the natural. Even the Word that's gone through my brain--I know it's there, but it doesn't come out when I want to pray prayers, or I want to comfort people, or I want to instruct them. It's so difficult to even get out the things that I know are there. It just seems that there is such a barrier. It's such a fight for it even to come to my memory, to come to the surface.
       6. Oh Jesus, I really want to be a better channel, a better vessel. I want to be able to hear more clearly from You, and just as important, I want to be able to express what I hear, what I think, and what I feel. You said You'd give me Your thoughts, and Dad said he'd give me his thoughts, but then I have to articulate them in words. Please, Lord, give me the words.
       7. And, Lord, I really think You should add the gift of prophecy too, because I think I really need it now. But You know best. I've got wonderful prophets all around and I'm just so thankful and it's so beautiful. But it would be a blessing to have the gift of prophecy just for me personally, for little things that come up that I can't call together our Home or other Homes to have a big prayer session about. I really would like to hear more clearly and directly from You, if You don't mind. Thy will be done.
       8. I don't like to be crying because it hurts my eyes and gives me headaches, but I just can't say this without crying because this is my deepest longing and my most earnest desire, that I will be able to show Your love to others. And Lord, You know that in order to show them that love, I have to tell them, because I can't take them in my arms and I can't touch them and feel them, caress them and heal them. So I have to do it through the words You give me. I know You try to give me words, but it's so hard for me to get them.
       9. Please, please help me, Lord. I'm sorry if I'm murmuring and if I sound ungrateful, but I really could do better for You. But I need more effectiveness in expressing myself, in communicating, in interpreting. I don't want these things for myself, I just want them for Thy people. I'm not asking to be erudite or intellectual, I just want to be like You, Jesus.
       10. The Words You spoke were so simple, yet so clear and so beautiful, so loving and so profound, so powerful, so life-giving and so deep, so thorough, so complete, with nothing missing.--Everything there, nothing that shouldn't be there, just enough and not too much.--So pure, so clear and clean, unadulterated with anything that would have hurt them, confused them, or covered them up, completely uncorrupted, genuine, wholehearted, tried and proven.
       11. Lord, if I'm even a little bit representative of You here on earth, I need to speak words like You do. At first thought, it seems presumptuous for me to say this, for me to ask. Nevertheless, You promised so many times in Your Word that if we open our mouths You would fill them; if we'd ask for bread You wouldn't give us a stone; if we'd seek we'd find. You said You would put the Words in our mouths, You would give us Your mind and Your nature. It seems that You do want to, so that's what gives me the faith to ask. Certainly, Lord, You'll help me, because surely You, much more than I, want Your people to drink of waters that are clear and unclouded.
       12. Oh Jesus, I need Your help so much! I've been given so much love! I've been overwhelmed by love in every way for my whole life. I have to do something with it, I can't just keep it. I have to share it, and the only way I can share it is by communicating it in print. But how can I get down on paper all of Your great great love that You've showered upon me? How can I verbalize it? Please give me the answers, Lord! Please give me the thoughts. Please give me the words.
       13. Help my precious loved ones to pray for me that You will pour on me a special anointing for this great responsibility. Or if You have already, Lord, I pray that I'll be able to receive it and I'll be able to break through the barriers, the obstacles, and overcome these hindrances and walls, to be able to rise above them and soar to greater heights where I can fulfill the anointing, lay hold on the power, the mantle, and make it work for me and for You and for others.
       14. In the meantime, I'm determined I'm going to just do whatever I can, however rough and incomplete it may be, however unpolished or disjointed, however mediocre, or however much it falls short of expressing the way You really are and what Your love is. I'll just keep doing what I'm doing, and do what I can to the best of my ability. That's all I can do unless You help me to do more.
       15. Forgive me, Lord, if I'm complaining. I just want to be able to show what You are in a better way. I want to do You justice. Well, I can't do You justice, obviously, but I don't want to confine You and restrict You to just these few meagre, stumbling words. At least I know Thy Spirit can enlarge them and expand them and multiply them, so please do that, Lord. No matter how inadequate my words are, Your Spirit can empower them. And if that's the way You prefer to do it, there's nothing I can do about it and I'll just be thankful that I can say anything at all. I'm so thankful that for some reason You've chosen to use me to help Your people. So it's Your problem, Lord. I'm doing the best I can, but I do want to do better, and that's up to You.
       16. I love You, Jesus, You know I do. I just would so much like to have people see You the way You are, to see what Your love is really like. Well, Lord, thank You for listening! I know You hear me and I know You're going to do whatever is best for me and for Your work. I'm Yours forever.
       * * *
       17. So, dear Family, I really would like it very much if you all would pray that the Lord would help me to be a clear channel and to hear from Him and to be able to express it. I want to pray the words to that beautiful song that Peter Pioneer sings on the "My Heart ... Your Home" tape:

              In every way, in all I do,
       Help me to myself and to You be true.
       Not what I say, but what I live;
       Not what I take, but what I give.

              In every [EDITED: "letter"] that I may write,
       Help me to express what's deep inside.
       Not just new words cleverly [EDITED: "said"],
       But let my heart fill my pen, fill my tongue.

              Help me to yield, I pray,
       Not to do things my own way.
       To do Your will.
       Help me to myself be true--
       True to others, true to You.
       And as I look to You,
       Your love will give me strength to follow You,
       To live for You, and die for You.

              In every heart, help me to see
       How to give to them the love
       You've given me.
       That it may grow and overflow
       On other hearts longing for Thee.

              In every way, in all I do,
       Help me to myself and to You be true.

              18. I also pray that other prayer which has become my theme song (the hymn "Open My Eyes, that I May See," written by Clara H. Scott, 1841-1897):

              Open my eyes, that I may see
       Glimpses of truth Thou hast for me;
       Place in my hands the wonderful key
       That shall unlock, and set me free.
       Silently now I wait for Thee,
       Ready, my God, Thy will to see;
       Open my eyes, illumine me, Spirit Divine!

              Open my ears, that I may hear
       Voices of truth Thou sendest clear;
       And while the wave-notes fall on my ear,
       Ev'rything false will disappear.
       Silently now I wait for Thee,
       Ready, my God, Thy will to see;

              Open my ears, illumine me, Spirit Divine!
       Open my mouth, and let me bear
       Tidings of mercy ev'rywhere;
       Open my heart, and let me prepare
       Love with Thy children thus to share.
       Silently now I wait for Thee,
       Ready, my God, Thy will to see;
       Open my heart, illumine me, Spirit Divine!

       * * * * * * *
Prophecies received for Mama on her birthday, 1994, by the DF Home in Thailand

       Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. Truly My queen hath laid down her life for you, because she loves you with an everlasting love that comes from the very heart and bosom of David, and she doth seek to please Me above all things, to do My will and to feed My sheep. Pray for her! Pray for her, that her strength fail not.
       * * *
       She is My queen, she is My lover, she is My prophetess of the Endtime. Follow her! Pray for her! She loves Me, that is why she loves you and feeds you. Keep her in your prayers. Listen to her counsel, for what she gives to you comes from Me. She is My special tool, My channel.
       * * *
       She hath but a little strength, but I will strengthen her with the strength that I supply, for she poureth out her soul to the hungry. I am with My dear Maria, and I will guide and comfort her and lead her as you uphold her in prayer. For she is My torch bearer to the world and lifts the flame of David high, and ye must also lift her up in prayer.
       Do not forget to pray for My queen, for she needs your prayers. She depends on your prayers and her work is accomplished through your prayers. Do not consider your time wasted as ye minister to Maria in prayer, for it is through prayer that I hold her up and I work in her and accomplish My work through her. She needs you--do not fail her by not praying for her. Uphold her, honor her and respect her by praying for her.
       * * *
       For she is the keeper of the Words and the keeper of the Flame; therefore will I keep her in the day of tribulation. And in that day shall many come to her to hear the Words, for there shall be a famine in the land for the Word of God. So be faithful to lift up your hearts in prayer for Maria, that she may continue in the great calling that I have for her.

       
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