The Family / Children of God

MEET JOE BLACK (1998)
Brad Pitt, Anthony Hopkins
       Drama/love story about the angel of death who, on assignment to Earth to escort an elderly man to the afterlife, wants to partake of human experience and falls in love with the man's daughter. Not an accurate representation of the workings of the spirit world, but otherwise an ins piring and uplifting movie.

WHAT DREAMS MAY COME (1998)
Robin Williams, Cuba Gooding Jr., Annabella Sciorra
       Drama about a man who dies and goes to Heaven, but whose great love for his wife causes him to try to help her from the spirit world. Although some of the representation of the afterlife is not scriptural, it could be a good springboard for witnessing discussions. Be sure to read the accompanying prophecy to get the Lord's and Dad's view on it!

Movies Rated for Junior Teens and Up

AT FIRST SIGHT (1999)
Val Kilmer, Mira Sorvino, Kelly McGillis
       Drama/love story about a high-powered businesswoman who falls in love with a blind massage therapist at a health spa, and the tests and trials and experiences that they go through when an opportunity becomes available for him to have his sight restored. Based on a true story.

A CIVIL ACTION (1998)
John Travolta, Robert Duvall, Kathleen Quinlan
       Intricate courtroom drama about a hot-shot, self-assured small-time lawyer who takes on two huge companies after the deaths of several children are traced to possible pollution from their plants. Based on a true story. Could be suitable for JETTs, with discussion and explanation of fairly complicated subject matter.

reviews

Meet Joe Black
       (Jesus speaking:) There are truths here that I would not withhold from My little ones, but I say to pray for discernment, for under the outer layer of truth there are also lies that, if left unchecked to grow in your mind, will b ecome doubts. Be on guard, for although the spirit world they paint is supposedly a benign one, it is a spirit world without Me, a spirit world in which all may do as they please. I want you, My elect, to understand, so that you may instruct many. So watch this movie with your eyes open. Ask Me to show you the truth and I will. (End of message from Jesus.)

What Dreams May Come
       (Jesus speaking:) This movie is not the pure waters of My truth. It is not a source of feeding, nor should My Famil y base their doctrines or beliefs in Heaven or the spirit world on it. But, for those who already know My truth, this movie and the topics and questions brought up in it could be a helpful springboard for witnessing. On one hand it is a sham of reality, because I am the way, the truth and the life, and no man comes to the Father but by Me. On the other hand, it portrays much truth, because it shows that there is an afterlife, a Heaven, a Hell, and that there is a God. It is a milky message compa red to the truth you have, but milk is what people must start with before they are ready to receive meat. (End of message from Jesus.)

       (Dad speaking:) These movies about the spirit world are a little tricky; you can't just watch them for entertainment's sake. You have to be on guard. If some are sensitive to the negative images, they should pray beforehand and ask the Lord if He wants them to see it. Those who don't have a tendency to be affected negatively also need to pray that they will b e able to choose the good and eschew those things that aren't the Gospel truth.
This movie is going to make people think and wonder how things really are. That's good, because Jesus said `seek and you shall find'. It's going to cause a lot of people to ask questions, and Jesus will make sure that somehow they find the answers, at least what they need to know and can understand. Even the hardest heart and the most analytical mind can't help but wonder if there really is something more than just what they can see and feel. That's why these movies about the spirit world and angels and demons are so appealing and so intriguing.
       Normally people put their questions about the spirit world on the back burner. They don't know the answers, and they figure that they'll never know, so they assume, "What's the use?" But when they sit down for long enough to watch a movie, especially something like this that's so graphic and emotionally-charged, it grabs them, and they can't help but ask themselv es those questions again: "Is there a God? Is there a Heaven? And if so, what do I have to do to get there?" So, if by seeing something like this, it makes them hungry enough or curious enough, or even scared enough to ask themselves these questions, then the Lord will somehow get the answers to them that they're seeking.
       This movie could and should have been better. Even the most beautiful place in the universe would not be Heaven without God and His love, and that was the saddest part about this movie. They didn't include God. The closest thing there was to God's supernatural love was that typical Hollywood-type romance, the strong undying love of this poor man for his wife, his "soul mate." But at least it gets some people to thinking. The Lord will use this as a way of getting people to think more about Him, even if it scares them into wanting to go to Heaven. (End of message from Dad.)

At First Sight
       (Jesus speaking:) This movie is a good portrayal of the ups and downs of l ove. It is realistic and has an interesting plot line. But the outstanding thing about this movie, which would make it of greatest value to My children, is that it shows the path of true love. The course of true love never runs completely smooth, especially when those involved are trying to pour each other into a mold, or have them be a certain way that they think would be better. If they would accept each other the way they are, complete with faults, failings and imperfections, then they could have a beautiful love that could rise above whatever hindrances or problems it encounters, and be a tremendous blessing and sample to others as well.
       Your life in My service is not without its hardships, but if you can endure and rise above those petty little details of everyday life, you'll find your life transformed into one that is more caring, concerned, and able to show My love to others, in all of its truth and fullness. (End of message from Jesus.)

A Civil Action
(Dad speaking:) Thi s isn't your average action-packed thriller; it isn't your typical lawyer movie where everything turns out just peachy. The story is a little more realistic and true to life, because it's based on a true story. It's a good movie, good for entertainment, but it's certainly not high impact.
       Through the whole vein of the movie, you see once again, that so many people out in the world live for nothing but money. It's a cutthroat society; everyone looking out for number one, and not giving a damn a bout anyone else. It's not a fictional story, and crimes of a far, far greater magnitude are happening out there every day. (End of message from Dad.)

personals

       James Nepali would like to get in touch with Abner Dutch and French Lily, Oliver and Liz, American Jonathan and English Joy, English Francis and Joy, Gabriel and Mary Spanish. Add: T.S.C. 707/56 Eros Apt. Nehru Place, New Delhi 110019 INDIA.
       Andrew and Italian Mary would like to get in touch with German Crystal. Same address as James Nepali (above).
       Hello, John and Abi (Szeghed Home), could you please contact Andy and Nina whenever possible. Also Mike and Jenny, please write to e-mail: tapoose@hotmail.com.
       Micah Bear, I've been trying to get in touch with you for a few months. Please contact us at e-mail: Love John and Maria.
       Looking for Joy (of Rose, South African). I knew you in a combo in Switzerland 8 years ago. Please contact Maria (of Jenny, formerly Mary W.) through African ABM.
       Agustin (outside member) asks Miguel and Maria (in Spain) who were in Venezuela in 94 to get in touch with him through e-mail: aalbornoz(a)hotmail.com. Add: Apartado 17103, Caracas 1015-A, Venezuela.

ads

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grapes

       To the dear team at the Lake House: A big thank you to Michael and Joan, Abi, Sally and all for your kindnes s and giving to every team that has passed through over the past several years. Even when they were "up to their eyes" trying to get ready to move out, they still took time for us and helped us with needs, food, etc. We think they are WONDERFUL!! I'm sure that there are many who would second that! WLY Sweet Lake Housers!
--Jonathan and Mary and team in Ukraine

       To all the FM, CM, and outside members who have helped us on our way to the East: João and Clara, the Greenhouse (SP), Martin and Am y, Ive, Luz and Ricardo, Matt and Joy, the BSC, the Oasis (Rio), Ana (of Dave), Isabel, Barney and Joanna, the DC Home, and our sweet Mark. It takes a lot of love, help, and prayers to get to the mission field! Thanks forever!
--Abi and Steph (now on our way to Taiwan)

       A heartfelt THANK YOU to Mary (18), who came to our Home to help Diamond with the care of the children and the many household chores, when Diamond was about to have our sixth baby. She was always willing to do whatever was ne eded, prepare nutritious food, school the kids, clean up after us, etc. And that with a cheerful heart, a good sample to all! Hats off to YOU Mary. We love you and we wouldn't have made it without you. We are proud of you!
--Diamond and Dust, Romania

       Thank you for being so in tune, Daniel, Miracle and David (SD13) and Marie Smith (AF093)! We were sending a request for financial help to open the first Family Home in Cambodia and you "answered before we called"! And thanks to all those who ha ve sent gifts and translations to help with our road trips there during the last three years! We love you!
--Tommy and Serena, Thailand

       I wanted to say how very thankful I was to have the very warm and loving hospitality of the dear Family in Sydney, Australia, where I went to have a family reunion. A very big thank you to James, Jasmine, Lamb, Mark, Kelita and all for going so far out of your way to make my visit so smooth--by helping me to and from the airport, bus stations, and allowing me to stay with you; taking me to some of the Homes of the precious brethren I've known for years and allowing me to have the time to fill up on all the New Wine before returning to my field of Thailand.
       Also a very special thank you to the SGAs and senior teens who really made me feel welcome and were so sweet and loving! What a wonderful precious Family.
--Gideon, Thailand

QNAs

       Q: Is Mama and Peter's E-mail address still MPG@ibm.net or has it changed since G is no longer there?
--El am, Amy and Katie, USA
       A: The e-mail address remains the same.

Health is Wealth

       [Note: The medical advice in "Health is Wealth" has been garnered from a number of sources: Dad's counsel, medical books, FED departments, veteran parents, Family nutritionists, practicing doctors, and your tips and personal experience. We will not be able to exhaustively cover each subject, but we will try to cover the basics. This column is not meant to be a substitute for seeking professional medical advi ce if you are ill, and, most of all, seeking the Lord each step of the way! In keeping with Dad's counsel and our Charter guidelines, each Family member is responsible to pray and act upon their own faith regarding their health and, when necessary, seek a doctor's professional counsel. A practicing Family doctor in the USA, Chris, has kindly agreed to go over these columns for medical accuracy.]

Fibrocystic Disease
--courtesy of Ginny, Japan

       One year ago I began to notice my right breast hurt when people would give me tight hugs which put pressure on my chest. I could feel a small mass or lump in the breast, and after praying about it, decided to have it checked by a doctor. The possibility of breast cancer was on my mind, so I was relieved to find out it wasn't cancer, but something called fibrocystic disease of the breast.
       I learned that iodine deficiency is a common reason for developing the disease. Here in Japan the salt isn't iodized, as it is in many countries, because the Japanese diet is naturally high in iodine from all the fish and seaweed they eat. However, the Homes I've lived in haven't been able to provision much fish or seaweed, so as a result we have had very little iodine in our diets. I don't know for sure if that contributed to me getting this disease, but I'm now praying and faithfully eating seaweed!
       The following is some helpful information on the subject from the book, "Prescription for Nutritional Healing" by James F. Balch, M.D. and Phyll is A. Balch, C.N.C.:

       "Upwards of fifty percent of adult females have fibrocystic disease of the breast. The Medical College of Pennsylvania states that an iodine deficiency is a common reason for fibrocystic disease. Other factors include hormone imbalance and abnormal breast milk production (caused by high amounts of the hormone estrogen).
       "In fibrocystic disease, round lumps that move freely and are either firm or soft are produced. Symptoms include tenderness and lumpiness in the breast s. Pain is usually most severe before menstruation. The cysts may change in size.
       "In this disease, cysts become filled with fluid and fibrous tissue surrounds the cysts and thickens like a scar. The pressure can cause pain. Fluid is reabsorbed by the breast tissue when a hormone imbalance or abnormal milk production occurs. The milk-producing glands multiply and carry milk into the supporting fibrous tissue, resulting in fibrocystic disease of the breast. As a woman ages, it becomes more diff icult for the lymph system to absorb this fluid completely. Fluid is trapped and results in cysts and inflammation of the breast. These cysts are benign.
       "A cyst is tender and moves freely -- it feels like an eyeball behind the lid. A cancerous growth usually does not move freely, is most often not tender, and does not go away. In a simple office procedure, the doctor will use a needle to diagnose fibrocystic disease. The needle is used to remove fluid from the cysts. A mammogram is usually ta ken to rule out cancer. (Note: In my case I was given an ultrasound instead, as I didn't want to have an x-ray unless absolutely necessary.)
       "There have been good results using primrose oil to reduce the size of the cysts. The diet below will also help.

Suggested Vitamin Supplements:
       Kelp - 6 tablets daily
       Primrose oil capsules - 2 capsules, 3 times daily
       Vitamin E emulsion - 1,000 IU daily for 1 month, or start at 400 IU and increase slowly to 1,000 IU.
       Vitamin A plus beta-carotene - 15,000 IU daily
       Vitamin B6 (pyridoxine) - 50 mg, 3 times daily
       Thiamine (B1) - 50 mg, 3 times daily
       B complex - daily
       Vitamin C - 3,000 - 7,000 mg daily in divided doses
       High-quality multimineral complex

Suggested Herbs:
       echinacea, goldenseal, herbal squaw vine, mullein, pau d'arco, poke root, and red clover.

Diet Recommendations:
       A low-fat and high-fiber diet is important!
       Eat more raw foods, including seeds, nuts and grains.
       Include in your diet, three or more times a day, apples, grapes, bananas, yogurt and fresh vegetables.
       Whole grains and beans are an important part of the diet.

Foods to Avoid:
       Alcohol, animal products, cooking oils, rancid foods, fried foods, salt, sugar, and all white flour products.
       Avoid animal fats, such as those found in bacon, sausage, gravies, ham, beef, and pork.
       Most importantly, avoid coffee, tea (except herbal teas), cola drinks and chocolate … any foods which contain caffeine. According to research done, women wh o eliminate caffeine-containing substances from their diets had a high rate of disappearing and elimination of cysts.

       (Editor's note: Although this is good counsel, we thought we should still check it with the Lord, and He sent Dr. Koger to say the following:)

       (Dr. Koger speaking:) Some of these products mentioned in this article would be very expensive for the Family on the field, and I wouldn't want them to worry or feel that their health is totally dependent on, for example, whether o r not they have enough primrose oil or supplementary Vitamin E or A capsules in their diet. These things are expensive and if they aren't able to get the things mentioned here, it doesn't mean the Lord won't heal them and help their condition. They can just do the best with the foods they have available to them in their area, and try to eat extra portions of those foods that are high in these vitamins and minerals.
       It also suggests avoiding animal products and the fat in meats, and although it 's helpful to reduce this because of the fat content--as too much fat isn't good for you--women shouldn't feel that they need to cut all animal products out of their diet because these products also have a lot of good things in them that women need, like protein, iron, calcium, acids, vitamins, etc. So it wouldn't be good to completely avoid animal products. You can reduce your intake, but still have some meats, dairy products and fat in your diet. (End of message.)

kid helps

Reading motiv ation
       My youngest son, just turned 9, has always struggled with his reading. Whenever asked to read his standard answer was: "I can't read." After receiving all the children's books last year this has changed. Having these new books sparked his interest in reading and he started making tremendous progress. Now he not only reads well--self taught--but has also become a lawyer of the Word.
--Home in India

Personal time solution
       I've found it hard to find personal time to spend with each of the children (in our busy small Home) but know it is vital and necessary. A solution I have tried a few times and want to be more consistent with is to simply eat dinner together with one child at a time in a separate room. It really helps our communication and makes them feel more special. It helps me not to just herd them all around together every day, but to get more in tune with them as individuals. It's especially fun when I light a candle and round up a simple dessert and we pretend to be in a restaurant together.
--Mary, Ukraine

forum

[What they weren't planning]
       Female (SGA), Europe: Most of my friends left the Family and I decided to follow up on how some were doing. While doing so, I came to an interesting realization--almost all of them had some complaint or reason why they thought the Family was not the right place for them. The funny thing is that once they left most of them ended up doing in the System what they hated most about the Family--only out there it was ten times worse.
       For example, some girls would complain about "these mushy uncles coming on to you" etc. Well, they ended up as strippers with old guys really mushing over them. A couple guys who didn't like having people tell them what to do left and joined the Navy. Some of my friends, who didn't like to work and always complained that the Family worked them too hard, went out and had to get jobs to support themselves. They've ended up slaving away, doing tons more physical work then they e ver did in the Family.
       Some other guys left `cause they felt that in the Family they weren't doing anything worthwhile with their lives; they wanted to go out and do something great, but they became bums on the street. There was also a JETT who hated home schooling. His parents sent him to System school--a private school, not even a public school--and he found out how much better he had it at home. Then there's a girl who always complained about Family boys, that they weren't sweet or as gentl emanly as the guys in the System, etc. Well, her first experience of those "gentlemen in the System" was a rape. I was that girl, so I know what I'm talking about.
       If people would be more thankful for what they have, a lot of hurt, heartaches and hardships would be avoided. This also proved to me the saying: "All that glitters out there is not gold." When I look at the System a lot looks great and cool and all, but it's all an illusion. For me in particular my illusion was all those gorgeous g uys on TV or who I'd see walking down the street. When I'd compare them to Family guys, it seemed the Family lacked something. In the movies the guys all seem so perfect and their relationships basically always work out great, and when they have sex it's like wow, so I figured I could be fortunate and get a guy like that. But after what happened to me, I changed my views pretty quick. It's not what's on the outside, but the inside that counts--though if the outside is good too, I won't object. H a!
       I started thinking about this `cause a lot of teens and JETTs are now going through "the Family vs. the system" stage and are seeing the System through illusion instead of reality. I wish there was a way to get through to them so that they wouldn't have to go out and see for themselves what we've been trying to spare them from.

[Fun father figure]
       Matthew, Poland: It's really nice to have had the experience of working close to one of the JETTs in our Home. I've spent fun computer time with him, not just playing games but editing photos and creating art--challenging him to make the photos different yet tasteful. Also involving myself in his activities and at the same time allowing good open communication and keeping him in line so to speak, in a respectful way. I have since received from him a willingness to do the things and jobs he doesn't normally like to do as well as respect towards me. I guess you could say that I've been to him over the last few months a "fun father fig ure" and we're going to miss those times when we leave. I've never had this type of friendship even though it's in the mailings with the "side by side" vision. Trying it has given me the faith to try to reach out more, especially to those without a dad.

[Honesty vs. lashing out]
       Anonymous, Africa: Honesty is an integral part of our lifestyle. Honesty gives us the opportunity to live communally, understand and communicate with each other. It takes a lot to be truly honest, and all of us slip from time to time. It's hard to have everything you think and feel openly laid out to others. However, when a lack of it starts interfering with the running of a Home or causing unnecessary feelings to come up between Homes, then I believe something has not been said, or what has been said is not entirely correct.
       Have you ever gotten off the phone and felt terrible? --Every kindness or word of encouragement spoken to someone else seems to have been turned against you, and you wonder if you'l l be able to reconcile the ill feelings? When it comes down to it, what sort of standard are we uplifting when we phone up another Home in utter anger? Anger to the point you cannot communicate and sort problems out in the proper fashion. It's sad to lash out at anyone, whether in our Homes or phoning, but on the phone your privacy may not always be counted on. Your counterpart may not even know the entire story that has led to the explosion, but if you've left something to their discretion, ask ing them to pray about an issue, don't lash out at them when they have the faith to do something you don't necessarily agree with.
       For the sake of love and what we stand for in this Family, don't later lash out in anger over phones; wait till you can control yourself and pray and discuss the matter in an appropriate manner and come to a mutual agreement. Give yourself time to relax and let the anger subside; it may help you see things as the other person may have seen it. You may be exploding over a misunderstanding that could easily be solved.

[A big trial]
       Female, Brazil: My daughter is turning 10 and a new horizon comes before us as parents. As you know, we have a lot of bad influences that come from the States and other 1st world countries. For me, as a Brazilian national, it's a big trial that some of these attitudes--worldliness, dress code, way of talking, etc.--that are common in our young people, seem at times to be bigger and more worldly than in our "local" System. It almost becomes a cultural question.
       When I visit my relatives who live outside a big city, in some aspects my kids' cousins seem more simple and sweet than some of our kids. They wear simple jeans and clothes, are not crazy about every movie that comes out, and weird styles, don't know all the actors' names, etc. They watch Brazilian novelas, yes, and may know about our national "stars," but it doesn't seem so "wicked," if you can understand me. I don't want to generalize, as in so many other areas our children are so superior. But I can't avoid the concern that my daughter will also fall into this "Americanism" as she grows older, because it's all around her. And I can't totally isolate her.
       Back to the cultural question: I'm very thankful for Dad, all he taught us and the Christian input I got from America. But that's it!--I don't want their culture. But the American culture is so strong in the Family, and worst of all, many young people are proud of it. As nationals we forsook our cultures and were happy to have God's input, to leave it all behind for something worth much more--the Lord and His Family. All I want is for my kids to grow up with Family input and not to be worldly and assimilate a culture that is worse than mine was.
       So although we are a group that originated in the States, I wish we had less of America's spirit in our way of life. I enjoy the company of young people a lot and for the past ten years have basically lived in teen Homes or big Homes with lots of young people. So it's not that I'm an old-style person, but I can't help but feel this burden. I think the young people should feel free to be young, but their fascination for the bad also saddens me. Can't they also be expected to "forsake" some things to be disciples?

[Low letters]
       National at heart, Japan: I like to call myself a Japanese national, though I am not, because I have been here in Japan for a long, long time. I consider this my home more than any other place and I lov e the culture and the people.
       Some of us were talking about some comments we have heard, either in letters from other places or by word of mouth, about how Japan is not a mission field but rather a home field, and anyone who is still here should feel more-or-less bad about it. A relative of mine, in the Family, received a letter from someone across the world strongly suggesting that we are not in the Lord's highest will because we are here. It bothers those of us that are still here when we he ar self-righteous comments like that.
       Because I speak the language semi-fluently and love the country, my personal deal with the Lord is to stay here until He makes it very clear that He wants me to leave. At the moment, I have some wonderful sheep on the line and I am very excited that they are coming along so nicely.
       Japan has its share of loafers and, yes, those are the ones that should pray about moving. But I've recently traveled to some other countries, as well as heard the testimonies of returnees from poorer fields, and I've realized once again that you can be a loafer anywhere you go if that's all you want to be. Just moving to a "poor field" doesn't make you a missionary. As a matter of fact, those of us that are still here feel pretty lonely at times. For some people it's even a sacrifice to stay because it's easy to feel like the new visions around the world would be much more exciting. But we stay because somebody has to stay by the stuff.
       I admit, I have been guilty of passing harsh and unjustified judgments on some other fields--we all do it sometimes. But just remember that somebody on the other side of the world may think just the same things about you as you're thinking about them! Does this help us to be unified? My request is to please not write or say unloving or judgmental things about those left in Japan, the States or anywhere else. It's the Lord's business to take care of the burdens and the changes!

letters to the editor

Re: Mama's Christ mas message
       I read the message from Mama in Grapevine #55 commending all of us for our Christmas outreach and it was so sweet!! I was reaching burn-out stage, doing two shows every day with six small children which involves so many little details, as well as running the household, cooking, cleaning, etc. I was so touched to know that she understands the way it is in small Homes at Christmas time, and that she brings us and our struggles to the Lord! Thank you, Mama, for being such a loving she pherdess!
--Fe (of Val), USA

Re: Acronyms
       One merry day we get a few notes in our office, one asking us for a CC of a PPM, another one with a message from the MSC and yet another one about some sort of FML. It wasn't lunch time yet and we all sort of choked on this exotic alphabet soup. We tried to swallow it, but it didn't digest. We thought maybe David Komic would know, but he was too far away to ask.
       Request: Why not be temperate with these acronyms? If we have to use them, please let 's send definitions along with these awesome abbreviations. (Editor's note: The proper way to use acronyms is the first time you use it in a letter or article to write out the words, for example, Prayer and Prophecy Meeting (PPM.) Us unenlightened folks just can't decipher some of this scramble-jamble. No harm intended.
--SPALIM (Spanish LIM, just in case, though we don't even know what LIM stands for, ha!)

       (Editor's note: Neither did we! So we looked it up in the HomeARC and found that it stands for "Local Language Indigenous Mail Ministry"-- the name given to the translating centers back in 1980 when they not only translated and mailed local language mailings to the Homes but also received and processed some Homes' reports.)

parent survey
--respond to the Grapevine

       Which age group (from 0-13) do you feel needs more Word-based material?
       What pubs do you read to which ages? (In other words, what ages do you feel most benefit from the HOPE TKs, the MLKs, etc.)

focus: l aw of love

       Last year I was sharing with a single brother. We hit it off sexually but beyond that I was not interested in him as a mate or father for my kids. But he was willing and desirous to get together with me knowing that I was a single mom, plus he wanted to get married and have a family. Then I got pregnant! He was so excited as he had never had a baby before. He wanted to marry me right away and was very earnest in his desire to take care of me and be my husband, and father to my oth er children.
       At first it was a little too much for me as I had "my ideas" of a mate and plus, I had a 13-year old daughter who was no piece of cake to get to know or be close to. He was a real sweet guy but I felt I needed someone who knew more about being a father and husband. As time went on we had our ups and downs for sure (believe me, we had them!!!!!) and there were times that I said I'd never marry this guy.
       But we did make the effort to work together more closely and he helped me wit h my other young daughter a lot. I guess love just grew on me, because I fell in love with him. It took some time but it did happen when I made the effort to try. It started out as more of a friendship though (even a rocky friendship at times, but he hung on as I was pregnant and he so much wanted to have a little baby, and the Lord had given him a real love for me) which was nice for several reasons. There was not that big huge and sometimes distressing emotionalism that comes with falling in l ove.-- It was easy to brush my teeth in front of him, ha! Ever have a hard time brushing your teeth initially in front of this guy you're in love with? It was never hard to figure out what to say (which sometimes happens when you're first in love, nervousness, ha)! Anyway, all those little things I didn't have to worry about, which I was thankful for. Our love just grew out of wanting to try and working together!
       Now my opinion of him is: He's handsome, wonderful, a great lover, tender and jus t my man! Yielding works! I have proof and with someone (whom when I first met, I was not attracted to at all) I never imagined I would marry. In fact, if you would have told me that the first day I met him, my reaction would have been one of "shock" and "no way!" And I had mentally promised that I would never marry someone that was the same sign as me, as I didn't like that type of species of those I had met. (We're the same sign.) Ha! The Lord blew on that and proved that you can't go by feeli ngs or by what we think is right.
       All this to say that after reading the Law of Love series, we were very encouraged that we had followed the Lord in letting Him put us together instead of doing it "our way." We are very happy and know that we are each other's "mate."
--FGA woman

       This series has been very necessary, with all the little rules and considerations. It served as a guide for me when visiting a Home where a single sister asked if she could share with me. I said I'd love to but I hadn't talked about it with my wife yet, but that I'd be delighted to once I was able to consult with her. I did check with her and it was fine, so we shared. In the past I probably would have gone ahead and shared without consultation with my wife, as was the case many times. But this series gives us a guide that covers every detail and helps us avoid confusion and problems.
--FGA man, Venezuela

       After reading part #9, it gave me vision and faith for myself again (ha!), as I am personally looking at myself--old, wrinkled, and with white hair. I had virtually stopped taking care of myself and thought that sharing was not for me anymore, only for the young people. But after reading that GN, I started feeling sexy again and putting a little make-up on, and I started "hearing" about the difference as others were seeing it. TTL for the New Wine!
--FGA woman, South America

       My mate and I stopped sharing outside of our marriage after the Charter as I was very possessive, and have go ne through lots of intense jealousy battles and have been hurt deeply. But being overly possessive and not wanting to share my mate led him to have relationships on the side. This caused a lot of heartache for all the ones around, to where my mate stopped giving affection to other girls.
       During the past two years we have had time to strengthen our marriage and regain trust in each other. Now we can start off on the right foot, all over again, having the full counsel of these beautiful GNs, and being able to talk about it. Praying over everything and hearing from the Lord has liberated me! I want to open up my life again and reach out to others.
       I've always been the "goody goody" type, and never had in love feelings with anyone outside of my marriage; I always did any sharing the "right" way. So I felt that a lot of the counsel in these series was not for me, but for my mate. Thank the Lord, He is faithful! Just before reading part nine of the series, I fell head over heels in love with someone from another Home. My emotions ran wild and I have been battling for a few weeks now, having a hard time keeping my emotions under control. This has been very humbling for me, as I like to think I am in control of everything I do. I only watch videos once in a while, only drink tea, coffee or wine occasionally. In short, I would make sure to do everything by the book. I would get up early every morning and hear from the Lord, push praise time, prayer vigil, prayer day, and was very self-righteous about it.
       But now I feel totally devastated after reading part 10. It hit home, especially about the benefit of shepherding, and how humbling it is to share such intimate details of your life with others. It's very scary for me as I can see that the Lord has many lessons for me to learn. He wants me to grow in areas that I have been stagnant in for a long time. I pray that I can be yielded to what the Lord has in store for me and to gain the needed victories in my life.
--FGA w oman, India

       One of the main things that stuck out to me from the Law of Love series is how a key to avoiding a lot of our past mistakes when sharing is doing it in teamwork. It's not just me sharing with a sister but my mate and I sharing. When we pray about it together and hear from the Lord, then we both have a real peace that we're doing the right thing. Even if there are some forsake-all twinges, it doesn't affect us so much because we are both in agreement. I think it's a good idea if t he person wanting to share asks the mate of the person they are going to share with first if it's okay. This again brings the couple into your circle of love instead of just the two doing the sharing.
--FGA man, Taiwan

       When it comes to intimacy and emotion my husband and I are opposites. My preference is for the security and stability of a cozy relationship, being "the only one" in my husband's life; he is attracted to and appreciates the close friendship of many other women. When we read t he Law of Love series together I found myself only hearing selective portions of the letter, namely the guidelines to keep my husband's relations with others in check.
       Around the time the Law of Love series came out, my husband crossed the sexual affection rules that resulted in his being put on partial-excom. To others it could have been perceived as a small slip as she was only just out of his age range, but to me, it meant so much more. He had been attracted to this young woman for many lon g months, and with each month my concern grew, knowing what the possible fallout of one mistake could be. I told him of my fear to which he asked me to trust him, further assuring me that "she's underage." She was young, and unwise in her interaction with my husband and around me. Sure enough, one evening when I was with the children the mistake was made and, perhaps to spare himself from my wrath, he hid it from me and I learned of this incident through someone else.
       He had betrayed my trust and been dishonest about it, and I spared no words letting him know. True, they had made a mistake that had hurt and embarrassed me deeply, they'd broken the Law of Love, and they deserved the correction. But the horrible thing about it was that I was guilty of more--I refused to completely forgive him, and I became bitter against her. I buried the hatchet, but I left the handle sticking out and within reach. I felt the love I once had inside of me turning to anger and resentment. It drove a wed ge in our marriage and I ended up hurting us both.
       I went back and reread the Law of Love series in a different frame of mind--this time not seeing what boundaries it was giving my husband, but what I could do to more fully live the Law of Love, and I realized just how clueless I was. The happy ending is that the Lord used this experience to strengthen our marriage and our unity, and to help me to appreciate the many times my husband has gone out of his way to accommodate and assure me of his love.
--female (27), South America

       I really like that this series is spelled out in black and white. I've been married for a few years, and I tried to put what I thought was the Law of Love into practice in our marriage. I was actually more pushing for it in the wrong way (if you know what I mean).
       During the first year I really messed things up. I went through a lot of the wrong scenarios that the series talks about, so much so that it almost sounds like parts of this series could have b een addressing me specifically. Because things weren't so clearly laid out, like they are now with the "Law of Love" series, I was more of the opinion that it was just a matter of preference and opinion. My word against my wife's. I figured my wife was just pushing her side of things and not being "open." Boy, was I wrong!
       One clear example was the point about the "One Wife" vision, and putting the greater marriage first. I was of the opinion that if I put too much into my marriage and time wi th my wife, I wouldn't be pleasing the Lord and would also be looked down upon by others. But it was so extreme that I was fearful of cutting off from work on time or going to bed too early, to the hurt of my wife. I was actually minimizing my wife and my family, which made it a bit difficult for our marriage. But thanks to this series, I see things in a new light, and Heaven knows I desperately needed it.
--SGA male, Europe

       The thing I liked the most was that you addressed right from the b eginning that the Law of Love is not only concerning sex, but that we should live the Law of Love in all aspects of our lives.
       When we read the paragraphs that said that it is not only about sex, you could almost hear a sigh of relief in the room. Please don't think that now there is a loophole for us not to practice the sexual side of it, but I think that for many people it was almost scary to say the words "Law of Love," `cause everyone would feel right away that you were talking about sex. We should have the right attitude about it.
       I have been in different situations where I noticed that it was no problem to practice the sexual side of the Law of Love if the Home was practicing all other sides as well. Of course everything wasn't hunky-dory right from the beginning; we had to grow into it. But I know that all of us will remember our days together as the days that we lived in love and unity. Though our ways parted, we still love each other and are very good friends.
       We just re ceived the book "Cool Tips for Hot Sex," and my husband and I dived into it right away. It was so nice to read Family-made material on the subject! And of course, practicing it was even better! Ha!
--female, Russia

       We've finished reading #11 in the Law of Love series and I feel so different about my way of looking at sharing with others. I still want to share, but now I feel more sober and serious when considering going all the way with someone and possibly bringing forth a baby--it's a ver y real responsibility and we can no more just have the date and have fun, without thinking about the consequences and the responsibility involved.
--FGA man, Mexico

       Regarding marrying someone who you don't feel is your "perfect soul mate," I have some experience with that. I married someone when I was young who had some serious spiritual problems, for which he was excommed more than once. Then I had a very sweet and romantic relationship, where I was mated for about a year, which also broke up. This left me pretty bitter and at the time I didn't really want to even think about a mate. I thought I could just make it on my own with my two kids.
       Then the Lord brought this sweet brother into my life, who fell in love with me. I was thankful for his care, but in my natural reasoning he was two inches shorter than me, two years younger than me, and balding at that! But he kept after me! When I finally prayed about it, the Lord told me that I shouldn't be so picky, but should be thankf ul that someone is willing to put up with me and my idiosyncrasies and take care of me and my two kids. So I finally made the decision to yield and make the commitment to get mated to him. We have a very wonderful marriage and are going on 19 years now!
       Yes, we had to work at it, but so does everyone. There were times when we really had a hard time, but we learned to report on each other, correct each other, get lots of counsel, and we tried to be open to counsel. In return, the Lord has made us a wonderful united team and I am so thankful for my marriage. I wouldn't trade it for anything!! My husband is my most precious treasure--outside of the Lord, of course!
       We may not be "romantically" perfect for each other, but that's the wonderful thing about the Family--the Lord has also given both of us, at different times in our lives a sweet romantic relationship with someone for a short time. This filled that small part of our hearts that wasn't the perfect match, and satisfied the nee d for that kind of thing. But I would never trade the marriage that I worked so hard at for a romantic relationship that is based more on feelings. We feel that the love we have for each other and the years we have spent in building our marriage is a lot more real and worth a lot more than some "bubbly" feelings that usually pass with time anyway.
--adult woman, USA

       Although my wife and I share with others occasionally, it has been kind of like driving through a city with no stoplights, so it has not been something that we have stepped out to do very much. But this whole series is putting traffic lights at every intersection, and you can feel so much more secure driving through the city.
--FGA man, Asia

       The Law of Love was meaty and there were parts that were a little hard for all of us to digest. Certainly I can see the Lord's wisdom in focusing on responsibility and marriage. Thinking back over the years we have believed and lived the Law of Love, I realized that we have al ways been led to base our decisions on the needs of our children. Even during times when my husband and I have gotten into "hot and heavy" emotional relationships, we have always come back to the reality of the children and their needs, putting them first. This has always been the correct decision, and even though we went through some heartbreaks as a result, they were good for us, taught us many lessons and helped us to grow.
       At this point in our marriage, I feel that if my husband was to hav e a sweet, close, even emotional relationship with someone else, I would be very happy for him. I love him enough to realize that I can't be everything for him, and he is so wonderful and special that he deserves the love of others too. This attitude is reciprocated, and he has encouraged me in sharing with someone else, not just when it was sacrificial, but also when it was a little extra blessing in my life.
       Having gone through years of battles with the monster of jealousy, it feels good to be secure enough in our marriage that we can each encourage the other to reach out. That doesn't mean that we love each other less. That doesn't even mean that we aren't satisfied with what we've got. It just means that our love is steady and mature enough to not just believe the Law of Love, but to want to practice it as well.
--FGA woman, North America

       Before I turned 21, I had always been about as single as a single can get--no boyfriends, no affairs, and so few dates I could count them on one hand. I figured I believed in the Law of Love and that it sounded like a good thing, but having been behind the scenes for years and having had zero experience with the emotions that go along with it, my entry to the "adult world" of sharing and relationships was a little unsettling for me.
       I started having regular dates with a couple of guys, one of them being a married FGA who I work with. We had always gotten along well--he's a darling man--and somehow I wasn't too surprised when, wi thin a few months, I realized I was falling in love with him. He wasn't too surprised either, and neither was his wife, who, fortunately, I was also already friends with. They've both been so incredibly considerate, understanding, giving and patient all along, it just amazes me.
       I was more than surprised, though, at some of the other feelings and emotions that I found myself having at the same time. Almost from one day to the next I was completely beside myself with jealousy every time I knew he was having a date with another girl, or even just chatting with them, giving them a hug, or anything. It was even hard for me to see him and his mate together, and for awhile I tried to avoid them somewhat as I would just start weeping almost any time I'd see any affection or "special" interaction between them, or if they had gone out together, etc. I was just so envious of what they had, and was so busy looking at the "hole" of what I didn't have that I often failed to see the delicious "don ut" that I did have--sweet fun times and a close friendship with someone I love dearly, and who cares about me too.
       For a few months I was basically an emotional wreck, and I didn't quite know what my problem was or what to do about it. It was hard for me to admit I could be so "evil," but I eventually realized that what I wanted was to have as much of him as a wife would--and that just wasn't reality. He's been very straightforward with me from the beginning, that although he loves me and lik es to spend time with me, he doesn't feel the way I do; that his first loyalty and responsibility is to his wife and what we have is what we have.--Unless I want to back out altogether; which, while I've thought about it a good many times, I always come to the conclusion that that's not what I want.
       Over the last couple of years we've continued sharing and having a sweet relationship, and while I've had my ups and downs, my in-the-vic times and my out of it times, I thank the Lord for the bles sing He's given me in having a part of his heart and life. He's had to remind me from time to time about our little "contract." As much as I want to do the right thing and not hurt or pressure anybody, emotions can be overpowering things, and I've come to see that I need help from others at times to keep on the right track and not lose focus of how things should be.
       When I finally came face to face with reality--with the help of my sweet friend's honesty, my shepherds' wise counsel, the Word a nd personal prophecies--and decided to accept my situation and "get happy" about it, somehow I stopped being so miserable and started to enjoy life. I had this major revelation somewhere along the way: When you look at the good and all that you do have, life can be really good; when you focus on the negative and all that you think you lack, it can be really depressing.
       A quote from the Law of Love GN part 3 sums up what has been the key to victory and happiness for me: "The receiver must trust Me that what I am giving them through others is what I wish for them to receive, and they must be content and happy in this." I believe this relationship was the Lord's will and His plan, because He's said so, and because none of us went out of our way to make it happen, but it did. Through this sweet relationship He's blessed me both by allowing me to be part of this wonderful couple's lives, and by teaching me, and them as well, many precious and worthwhile--though sometimes difficult--lesson s through it.
       The long and short of the matter for me is that while this may not be my ideal "dream relationship," and while I don't expect things will even always be the way they are now, I have to say that my life is a lot better because of the Law of Love and this precious couple who is willing to live it. I had nothing before. I have something very special now.--I'm a satisfied customer.
--SGA

funny

       The chief rabbi of Israel and the Pope are in a meeting in Rome. The rabbi notices an unusually fancy phone on a side table in the Pope's private chambers.
       "What is that phone for?" he asks the pontiff.
       "It's my direct line to the Lord!"
       The rabbi is skeptical, and the Pope notices. The Holy Father insists that the rabbi try it out, and, indeed, he is connected to the Lord.
       The rabbi holds a lengthy discussion with Him. After hanging up, the rabbi says,
       "Thank you very much. This is great! But listen, I want to pay for my phone charges."
       The Pope of course refuses, but the rabbi is steadfast, and finally the pontiff gives in. He checks the counter on the phone and says: "All right! The charges were 100,000 Lira ($56)."
       The chief rabbi gladly hands over a packet of bills. A few months later, the Pope is in Jerusalem on an official visit. In the chief rabbi's chambers he sees a phone identical to his and learns it also is a direct line to the Lord. The Pope remembers he has an urgent matter that requires divine consultation and asks if he can use the rabb i's phone.
       The rabbi gladly agrees, hands him the phone, and the Pope chats away. After hanging up, the Pope offers to pay for the phone charges.
       The chief rabbi refuses to accept payment. After the Pope insists, the chief rabbi relents and looks on the phone counter and says: "1 Shekel 50!" ($0.42)
       The Pope looks surprised: "Why so cheap!?"
       The rabbi smiles: "Local call."

Did Jesus use a modem?

       Did Jesus use a modem
       At the Sermon on the Mount?
       Did He ever try a broadcast fax
       To send His message out?
       Did the disciples carry beepers
       As they went about their route?
       Did Jesus use a modem
       At the Sermon on the Mount?

       Did Paul use a laptop
       With lots of RAM and ROM?
       Were his letters posted on a BBS
       At Paul@Rome.Com?
       Did the man from Macedonia
       Send an E-mail saying "Come"?
       Did Paul use a laptop,
       With lots of RAM and ROM?

       Did Moses use a joystick
       At the parting of the sea?
       And a Satellite Guidance Tracking System,
       To show him where to be?
       Did he write the law on tablets,
       Or are they really on CD?
       Did Moses use a joystick
       At the parting of the sea?

       Did Jesus really die for us,
       One day upon a tree?
       Or was it just a hologram,
       Or technical wizardry?
       Can you download the Live Action Video Clip
       To play on your PC?
       Did Jesus really die for us,
       One day upon a tree?

       Have the wonders of this modern age
       Made you question what is true?
       How a single Man, in a simple time,
       Could offer life anew?
       How a sin less life, a cruel death,
       Then a glorious life again,
       Could offer more to a desperate world,
       Than all the inventions of man?

       If in your life, the voice of God
       Is sometimes hard to hear,
       With other voices calling,
       His doesn't touch your ear.
       Then set aside your laptop and modem,
       And all your fancy gear.
       And open your Bible, open your heart,
       And let your Father draw near.
--Author Unknown

cute kids

       Jay (2) was wanting to wear my shoes and be Mommy. "Okay," I said on ce he had them on, "what does Mommy do?" So together we talked about what mommies do. "Cleaning, laundry, dishes, cooking, etc.," after which he paused, looked at me thoughtfully and said, "I'll wear Daddy's shoes. Then I can just play!"
--Joan (of Stephen), Hungary

       Maggie, being eight months pregnant with twins was resting one afternoon, and snoring. Fanny (9) was in the next room, sick in bed and resting. We had a cleaning lady (Karen) helping at the time, and she was also in Fanny's room tidying up. So when she heard Maggie snoring, Karen asked Fanny: "Hey, what's that noise? Is that an airplane?"
       "No," says Fanny, "that's mommy snoring."
       "That's quite loud though, isn't it?"
       "Well, she has to snore for three right now, you know, because she's pregnant with twins!"
--courtesy of Michael and Maggie, Belgium

Also included with this file
Peculiar People (by Zeb)
       Caption 1 What are you up to?
       Caption 2 I'm filling out an application form to go to Africa!
       Caption 3 Oh!
       Caption 4 Done already? That was quick!
       Caption 5 Yeah, all I did was sign a blank sheet of paper.

(End of file.)