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In Reply to: Re: interesting post on Moving On posted by From Banshee on September 08, 2004 at 16:59:41:
I totally understand how you feel and I really can't blame you for lumping us all together. You don't know us as individuals only handles on a chat board.
I grew up in severe domestic violence and I still have issues with my mother re: why didn't you get us out of there. I always wonder what my life wouldve been like if she had left my father. My brother who committed suicide may still be alive, my sister may not have become a drug addict and lost many years of her life, I certainly would not have joined the Family at 17 to get away from my father, and missed out on an education and wasted six years of my life (let alone the following years of recovery) amoung other things. My siblings and I would be much more mentally healthy than we are that's for sure.
I love my mother and I know that she has her own reasons for not being able to stand up for herself and her children. That doesnt stop me being angry, however many counselling sessions I have. Her pain is great and I'd never let her know how I feel as I know she feels guilty enough and is now an old woman who deserves some peace and happiness.
When I saw signs of child abuse in the Family I left snatching my own children and fleeing. I thought 'well at least I've saved them from that'.
Years later I discovered that my stepson (from my wonderful new husband) had sexually abused both my precious children for years. This was after I left the Family! I have inherited my mother's guilt.
Maybe this will help you to see we are not all the same as the adults who abused you.
If I could do something to help any child of abuse (Family or otherwise) I would gladly give blood!
