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In Reply to: Re: Planning for health contingencies posted by Oldtimer on August 30, 2004 at 13:34:23:
Kids will generally accept and forgive a lot more abuse from their parents than they will from people who aren't biologically related. I think SGs resent the abuse they received from aunties & uncles a lot more, and the greatest anger is toward the leadership who set the abuse policies in motion for their parents and others to follow.
Their parents gave them life. "The cult" took their parents' attention and psychological support from them. It's natural to feel that if it weren't for "the cult," mom & dad might have been better parents.
Willingness to take care of parents and/or forgive and excuse them is due in large part to a person's identity being linked to his/her parents. We naturally make the best of who our parents are--even if they're very disappointing--because it says something about who we are. Kids will also hope against all reasonable evidence that inadequate parents will change someday and love them in a more unconditional manner.
Finally, a lot of SGs are parentified children. They grew up taking care of themselves and siblings. It's just another extension of a responsible caretaker role to look after failing elderly parents.
