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In Reply to: pressure and unyieldedness posted by porceleindoll on August 15, 2004 at 01:03:25:
After so many breakings and "dealings with" and after going out on the sts for long hrs with children in tow, having to earn money for our meals via litnessing and at the same time stay out looonnnngggg hrs. to meet a quota or call to get permission to come home, even in the dead of winter in a northern icy climate after the sts. rolled up for the night, I learned to not look at the letters but use one of the many successful family ways of selling. Like writing on a piece of paper that we help drug addicts or support a school. When you don't speak, people might even pity you thinking you are mute and or deaf. The letters we had to sell for "donations" were embarrassing enough, like: "Lovelight" and "Mountain Maid". So I learned to numb out and sell sell sell. That was the focus. If i did good enough, i might get reunited with one of my kids. Even in sickness the priority was getting out and selling. It was a drudgery, a nightmare, even when I started bringing in the quota and then some. So I got to quit a bit earlier? I came home and there was still plenty of work to do. Or if there wasn't I was expected to "Redeem the time" and read incessant drivel or memorize or take care of other people's kids instead of my own at times. Then there were the sessions to endure of shepherds who stimulated the sheep to produce produce produce with warnings. Trust me, shiners had it no better really because although I was not a long term shiner, or a record breaking one, there was greater expectations then. If I came home with a bad days take, there was a sense of dread. Remember the shiner that burnt out, probably because she was getting ill, and there was a letter written about her that she had Hodgkin's disease- a form of deadly cancer- and it was because she slowed down and wasn't productive enough? The Family was pure bondage. The most apt letter ever written was "Spider's Web" imo. Caught in a web and spirit sucked out of me. Revival can take a long long time. Sure do wish a big ole can of RAID would zap the spiders and free those still stuck in the webs..
