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In Reply to: Re: My Story posted by Anonymous on April 30, 2004 at 08:34:09:
How fortunate that you are at a University and have these resources. I worried a litle when I suggested a women's self-help group because this is not something that's available everywhere in the world.
If a women's group is doing what it's supposed to do, you won't be asked to explain anything when you show up. People will greet you and introduce themselves, and they will let you know it's OK if you listen and never say a thing.
Asking about the meeting schedule for an SA recovery group is kind of like buying a box of condoms. If you're not confortable saying "sexual abuse," there are other terms you can use like "intimacy issues" or "family issues." You can simply ask for a printed meeting schedule for the women's self-help groups. These should be labeled in a way that you'll figure out pretty quick which one is right for you.
Asking for counseling services works the same way. One of the reasons the intake person asks why you're coming in for services is because it's important to figure out right away whether you're suicidal. Just say you want to talk to someone about family issues, and you'll be no different than 70% of the other students who come in.
You may think the person at the counter will roll their eyes or look at you like you're a pervert, but the truth is, the person who helps you with referral information will probably act like business as usual and you'll be surprised at how casual she is. Something to keep in mind is that people who work in these offices (very often) are also survivors and/or friends & family members of survivors.
If any counselor or self-help group ever pressures you to talk about your abuse experience, you have every right to say no and walk away. Counseling & self-help groups are the exact opposite of being forced, coerced or pressured to say or do anything you don't want to do.
