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In Reply to: ray posted by ray on December 06, 2002 at 17:36:38:
Hi Ray. I didn't know about your confrontation to the m's. about their false teachings. But I do believe you probably have a pretty powerful story to tell having had that position. You must have seen a lot and gone thru a lot to get to the point to confront them. Can you tell me more about this? Somehow, I would imagine that the closer a person got to the inner circle, the harder the wind would blow. (picturing a hurricane here). So were you faced with blistering rebukes and then uplifts in positions, like a see-saw? Was your experience much like James Penn?
I think that your story could be very powerful in a healing way to people that are considering leaving the group because of its current doctrines and controls.
I think it is great that you added what you did to the resources section. I do believe that people can help in a big variety of ways. I know I have posted in a hostile manner to you in the past. When I first got on the ex-member sites there were a lot of posts about Berg, pro and con battles. That brought out much anger in me and I let it out here and elsewhere. I still do sometimes when I see it. Now the debate centers more around pro-active stances against the fam. and/or for recovery for those who may want to leave it. I have come under attack for some of my views. sometimes it is simply miscommunication. At other times it is clearly a different way of viewing things. For instance, I don't feel like I was stupid to join and do what I did in the f. I believe I was vulnerable and joined and the group caused a great deal of damage in my life and that of my family.
It is only in hindsight that I believed I made the right decision to leave. I look at it more like the battered women's syndrome and I don't blame the woman. I think you have to realize you have choices and then practice exercising choice in increments before your life can be actualized.
That is definitely a process. So at one point in my life when I saw a cult (any cult) person out distributing or whatever I would feel this huge anger and I let them have it. Now, I would most likely be inclined to sit down with them over a cup of coffee and try to make them think, plant something that causes them to question. Maybe give them a number or references of something available for them to get out should they ever consider it. The reason for that is because there were times I wish I had been given that number or references because when I was vulnerable and ready to leave there would have been some place to go. It wouldn't have seemed hopeless. On the other hand I can see why some want to take perpetrators of physical and or sexual abuse to court. Those individuals have every right to. Perhaps that is a consequence which they have to have to hit home. For some who lack a conscience, they don't need to be out on the streets. (true pedophiles). Anyway, all this to say, I would like to know more about what you think, and what you experienced.
