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In Reply to: Re: We were all victims of a manipulative and controlling posted by Sara on November 07, 2002 at 15:14:33:
Sara, I read your post, and as an FGA, I related. I can't tell you the number of times I got dealt with harshly for the slightest things, incl. the vain babbling bit. Also humiliated in horrific ways. Separated from my kids and partner, forced to be with my "mate" when I did not want to. Being reported by him and dealt with incl. in sexual ways. I can see as SG/SGA that the way to see it would be apathy on the part of the adults. From my perspective, it wasn't apathy, it was similar dynamics that came from the top. Being out, I am wondering how you are making it on the outside? How long have you been out? I want you to know that as an "FGA" that I am so sorry for what you have suffered. I would also like to know of SG/As that do need help. I think if some would post here and state their needs, that some FGAs could search out resources and be a support in their area in whatever ways that they can. I would hope that you would find here FGAs that DO want to help For me, I want to help not because of what I did or did not do in the family, it is because I know the wreckage and damage the family has wreaked in the lives of so many. I think finding an interested psychologist can help too. One that is actively interested in learning about or knows about family/cult dynamics. It seems that SGs/SGAs are doing an outstanding job of supporting each other, but I think it can also be healing (for any who want it) to realize the support they can possibly get from FGAs who are out of the family and have the family out of them.
