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exFamily.org > chatboards > genX > archives > post #3857

Phew - that's a hard one

Posted by Acheick on September 09, 2002 at 21:05:40:

In Reply to: At what point did you leave? posted by porceleindoll on September 09, 2002 at 20:14:34:

I was like you too, for a long time. Just solidly in the faith and believing, but I would have been happy to have left after only a few years. The fear and the doctrines kept me in and then my then husband continued it on. Funny though, when I talk to people who knew me at one point, they will often say - oh, you were so unhappy and wanting to leave. That was as far back as the late 70s. The FFing doctrines and the Davidito book were pretty hard for me to believe and practice. I really wanted no part in it, but I was so afraid to not obey berg, that he was a prophet of God and God was just testing my faith. All this was reinforced by my then husband and I being the loyal wife, had a hard time to go against it. I just kept hoping for a new doctrine that would replace those. I think I suspected Berg was not what he said he was, but I was so indoctrinated, I couldn't even breathe that to myself, especially since no one around me dare say that. All those stupid prophecies that never came to pass. I really don't think any of them came to pass except the ones that didn't require a prophet to figure out. I finally left a home in 1989 and mostly in disgust. By that time, I didn't even want to read Mo letters anymore at all. I was still tithing though, still so afraid. When I finally could have a conversation with others without fear of being reprimanded, that was the first thing we discussed - maybe Berg was not God's prophet. It took me about a year to fathom that.