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In Reply to: Re: It's called Social Darwinism. Get used to it. posted by Xman on September 06, 2007 at 15:34:48:
I'm not talking about how things should be, I'm talking about how things are. We have to live with the hand that life dealt us and the consequences of our choices.
I'm not in favor of making things any harder than they already are. What I'm doing is acknowleging the realities of life in the System, which are a lot different than life in the Family, where people are told to lie about the hand life dealt them ("the abuse never happened") and misattribute the natural consequences of their bad behavior and misinformed choices to "persecution for living godly in Christ."
Revenge is not a good thing, and I do my best not to dish it out. However, if someone lashes out at me as a consequence of things I've done or said, I'm not going to play the innocent victim, as if I haven't done anything to warrant their anger or hatred. I believe it's necessary to make an amends and clean my side of the street, but that doesn't happen automatically just because I've decided it's time to move on and quit beating myself up over the past. I think some FGAs are sorry about the past, but they'd rather try to forget it than make a proper amends and take a good look at the character defects that led them to make so many bad choices in the first place.
Yeah, they were brainwashed, but they still did shit and let some really rotten stuff happen. What I get pissed off about is people who make no attempt whatsoever to clean their side of the street and make an amends, but go on about how they're suffering because of someone's bitterness toward them over the past. Well, duh. Cult zombies dump a lot of shit in the street while they're out there on their brainwashed binge, and that shit doesn't suddenly disappear just because they've sobered up and the mind fog has finally lifted.
BTW, you know you've made a proper amends and sufficiently cleaned your side of the street if the person you've hurt says they can't possibly ever forgive you and will never forget that you were a total asshole to them at one point in life, and your response to their unforgiving anger is to say, "That's your choice, and your side of the street. You'll have to live with it, not me."
