moved through moving on

I must admit, that it's the very sad biographies/examples as depicted/described lately here again on Moving on

http://movingon.org/article.asp?sID=1&Cat=31&ID=4261

which cause me more than anything to read there & to want to know their plight.I cannot deny the reality of all that, yet it was also not the same environment I experienced...almost like another movie I was in or rather the sequal before the one G describes...it's like pandora's box got opened by the letters and much evil released...as the parents, the adults allowed it.We definetely had different spheres/levels of obedience.No wonder, much of the very weird stuff happened in WS-homes etc first...I still got to buy/order/read my copy of not without my sister & I figure it'll happen some time this summer, therefore I cannot participate in any discussion about it yet.

There were several accounts/lifestories at movingon, which left me speechless, ashamed, sorry & in tears.If you think of how many adults really were so fond of their kids.I observed them & I always thought they really loved them...but most/many I know, wanted to love the prophet...most of all God... more than them...without those "scriptural confinements" (false) they would have been very loving parents, the ones I met & observed.Then came a time, when they were not little & only cute anymore, where they needed some more "rope" (the family never understood, that it's proven to be healthier to play in & with the mud, than always to be super clean & tidy...although may be not in a 3rd world country...where it's all the more harder to raise children) ...especially as teenagers.The way I figured it back then: some families/parents, after having the fifth child or so, may be were relieved, to have help with their many kids.But since I wanted to enjoy my first child, I left Combo-living...their new rules were my way out.

But I cannot understand, how anyone can stand idle by, when a child, that has done very little wrong, gets tossed around & bullied...I "understand" it "more", in case of foster parents, cause in my opinion, we foster parents seemed to have cared less than the flesh & blood ones...but depending also, whether there was real love between the parents....but I fear, there was too much matchmaking, too many patchwork-families in TF...after all, it was often no real love...also real love IMO knows & sets some boundaries & limitations to the evil & where that is not the case, it can't be real love.So the parental love got squenched, ruled out by a "higher law", pretending to be altruistic, but in practice it just rendered the childen, teenagers just as defenseless preys for uttely confused adults.

The whole assessment of G is so outspoken and radical...I came actually to the same conclusion before reading it...after all it'd mean to be willing to turn in their own parents & where that is not the case, I am not so sure how much you can pin down only the responsible leaders, who dished out all the garbage (in consequence it'd mean for us metaphorically/spiritually to be like pigs...as a follower...to gobble without discernment that stuff up)...with TF-leadership sensing, which country has not too close a relationship with the US (or any other homecountry) especially in the legal, jurisdicial field, moving/linving accordingly.

Also I thought, if any SGA shared their story publicly, as G did in great part, and if anyone knew her, by name etc....which resulted in knowing sooner or later the mother's name, couldn't then any state attorney or anyone wanting to persue the case do so, even if the child wouldn't want it? Is therefore a sharing of those awful stories really not wanted by some/many??? for that reason...as I wondered about that too at times.

Just yesterday I spoke to an excollegue of mine, who needs some shorttimed financial help...in the course of getting to know him better & his situation, I had to hear that his wife/mate got sexually abused frequently as a child by her father, when she was 13.She just wishes relief from those experiences, but without having to go through the pain of taking her father to court.Some do though, I heard/read...some apparently don't...Is it a matter of love or protecting yourself from too much stress or....

All that has the stench of the pit, but if I don't read up about it, I don't realise fully what went wrong & how & the very least I can do is listen/read & confess my utter shame, that that happened in a group I once loved to be in.30 years ago that would have been unthinkable to me, but in hindsight I must say, the warning-signs along the road got overlooked...I partly attribute that to group-dynamics...which is what keeps me nowadays at distance from groups...& in bigger scepticism about people in general.