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Hoping to bring attention to their plight at the hands of bloodthirsty hunters and landgrabbers who steal more of their grazing land every year, the animals are starting to fight back! Taking a cue from the suicide bombers, deers have been throwing themselves in front of cars killing both themselves and the occupants of the cars.
State Farm estimates that 1.5 million vehicles collide with deer every year, resulting in 150 motorists deaths and $1.1 billion in vehicle damages.
But the head of the National Rifle Association said in a statement released over the weekend that "the fanatical suicide deers hate our freedom and are jealous of our speed in cars...they want to drive us off the highways". Go figure. Anyhow, he went on to say how his organization was going to ferret out and kill every last one of these terrorist deers so Americans could see the USA in their Chevrolet and drive without fear anywhere they damn well pleased.