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In Reply to: Fidelity posted by Swede on April 12, 2006 at 02:15:55:
I was still young when I left and my first reaction to relationships was to feel "selfish" to have jealousy or not have an "open" relationship. Then I avoided relationships for a good amount of time. After that, the most important value for me is monogamy and a committed relationship with the person I now consider to be my soul mate and who I am married to for about six years now.
In the first relationship I did not "cheat" but did not view my spouse as "cheating" when my spouse was having sex with others.
In the relationship I am in now, we both would consider it cheating to go outside the relationship and that is very important to us -NOT TO- in the full sense of what many people in the "system" view marriage to be about that consider a marriage sacred. I am very acculturated to the would outside of the Family.
I suffered from my state of mind of feeling selfish for any bad feelings about "sharing" my first spouse. That relationship lasted three years and nothing like the one I am in now.
