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In Reply to: Re: Right on! posted by Mr. Don on February 24, 2006 at 18:08:52:
I know you may be referring to never having witnessed child sexual abuse in person while in the Family.
But I was thinking of other forms of abuse which are not common in society at large and not societally acceptable in most countries in the world, like FFing doctrines, separating families as in husbands from wives and children from parents and their siblings too at times, children witnessing mothers dressing up to go out FFing and even realizing to some degree what that was. Children who don't know who their fathers are and have several step sisters and brothers many with no connection to their roots. The moving and not socializing with people of the countries we were in except for the purpose of "witnessing" or bringing in finances or favors to the group. Teaching children to be tools and not people and not encouraging them to get a higher education and or technical training in areas of interest. There are so many abusive and societally unacceptable behaviors that the Family practices. Some may be less now, while others are more.
Like all the channeling stuff and magical keys, guides and spirit helpers that children AND adults are encouraged to believe in as FACT and as REAL. It is like living in a psychotic's world where newborns learn everything upside down and backwards and dragged thru the gutter as normal. Then add to that the LJR whether graphic senior teen level and above or an explanation less graphic for younger groups.
You may feel the same about it. I just have a hard time with anyone saying that in HINDSIGHT they never saw any abuse of children.
I am guessing it is probably not what you meant to say.
I think what is important to talk about is where abuse was realized even if only in hindsight. Also I think it is important to (amongst ex members that were FG) discuss state of mind in the Family vs. coming to terms with the reality of the past in the Family.
I think also that many people see "FG" as a dirty word associated with "perpetrator" and I don't agree with that anymore than I think of the Family as starting out as a sex cult. Berg was behind the scenes (sexually perverse) but most of us did not know that for at least a few years and still most of us only found out how bad it was after getting out.
It doesn't do anyone any good to look at the past and say "I chose to harm children and myself" as if it was a decision like a pedophile makes when they set out to find a victim.
Lifton's criteria for thought reform really is something that applies to so many cults and people do things they would never dream of doing or that disgusts them and crazier is that they do it thinking it is doing God's service.
What comes to mind is the recent case of an adult woman who was abused by a pastor of a church that picked her to work with him. He was an authority figure to her that represented God and he twisted the scriptures to convince her God wanted her to have sex with him. There is a great deal of shame with coming to face with things done in the cult when looking at it in hindsight.
I don't think people can heal well if they don't look into what happened and how they got from point A of being an individual and Point B of becoming a member of a cult (not recognized as such while in).
So much more info is out today regarding abuse. Priest abusing children and women, other authority figures doing this. It exists in every strata of society but in society it exists as "wrong" while it is doctrine in a cult.
I am getting too wordy here and may be misread. I really wish sometime we could all chat about this in the chatroom here and clarify with each other what we mean.
