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In Reply to: Any final comments? posted by Researcher on December 01, 2005 at 15:08:07:
Here's a few minor things I noticed:
In several of the paragraphs you switch back and forth between "Stephen" and "Steven".
First paragraph, second line: "that narrator describe Stephen" I suggest changing it to "the narrator describes Stephen.
Fourth paragraph from the bottom, beginning with "Though no longer..." In a post below, Joseph pointed out that the meeting where most of the interviews took place, probably occurred in 1997. That makes sense, since the production date of the documentary is 1998. I suggest, therefore, changing this: "Steven was interviewed by DLI Productions for a documentary in 1998, entitled, The Love Prophet..." to something like this:
Stephen was interviewed for the 1998 documentary, The Love Prophet...
or
In 1997, Stephen was interviewed, along with other former members and current members, for the documentary....released in 1998.
or
You might want to include the 1998 date in the opening paragraph where you first mention the documentary. Then in the 4th from bottom paragraph you could refer to the interview taking place in 1997, or even drop the date of the interview.
