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In Reply to: Jim LaMattery's thots, reposted from below posted by Reposter on October 06, 2005 at 12:11:32:
I just read this, just got out of bed. Thanks for your thoughts. I was a bit suprised by the things Kristi said, you know that I'm really not in the know as far as your personal relationship with her, and etc. Living so far apart does that to you. I remember when I was visiting last time for the wedding, and we were altogether, it seemed like everyone was really happy, Kristi included, and we had a lot of fun chatting and hanging out. It's hard for me to make any comments on what happened during that show, except that I was taken back too over some of her accusations. I really hope you both can sort out the issues. You know that Dad had some similar difficulties with some of my siblings, and that it caused a lot of pain as well during that time, and at least things have turned in the step of healing and communications have started again. I have to admire dad for hanging on because I told him I wouldn't be able to handle it if I went through what he did. I don't do good with hurt and rejection.
I can relate to what Kristi said about you talking and asking her about the good things that happened in the group, when one was abused like she was, when one's siblings have been hurt as hers were, there is no good. Dad used to say the same thing, and it always made me mad at him, "Well, I can't throw it all out, there was some good stuff..." and while I didn't outright tell him to fuck-off, it always left me angry for a bit. He finally got the point, and when he took our hurts as his own hurts, he was able to chuck it all out. It makes a child feel as though they are not important when their parent talks good about something that left their life in pieces. And when I have visited you and you used to say good things about the COG, it left a similar distaste in my heart. I think you have gotten past that by now, but then again I won't make any assumption on it.
I know you are not responsible for Kristi having grown up in the cult, there was not much you could do, I was there when they were kidnapped from your house and spirited out of the country, we were all shocked, and the hurt that caused our entire LaMattery family, from grandparents to babies.
Anyway, there's so much more below the surface of this whole situation than can't be gotten into on the boards, and some things can only be solved through time. I know you are under constraint about what you can and cannot say online, it is rather unfair of us to discuss your personal life when you are limited in what you can actually say.
But lastly, I truly believe you love Kristi as you have loved my brother and sisters, that you have tried and will continue to try and be there for her as you have done for my siblings, and I hope that things between the two of you will be reconciled when the time is right. I don't agree that you are doing all this out of selfish motivation, as some on these boards feel. I am shocked by some of the outrageous guesses and criticisms, assumptions and others being thrown out here. Ah well, such is life, what's that saying about ..some of the people some of the time...
