Zathu (of Morningstar)

FSM 192
From Chris (formerly Zatthu of Morningstar), Pacific
Bitterness has been a very big hindrance in my life in the Family, & it's only been in the last year that I've been able to get a victory over it. My bitterness was directed towards my first mate (Elaine, formerly Morningstar) as a result of my jealousy over her from the time we got married. It came to a head a few times throughout the years, including the time of the Letter "Frustrated?" (See ML#835, parts 1-4.)
The final crisis came when Elaine was invited to the Japan TTC, after which my jealousy became such a big issue that I lost my job & was invited to another Home for retraining. I was warned that my jealousy & bitterness would end up in separation, & my wife finally left me, in spite of the fact that I wouldn't let her take any of the children. GHM!
This bitterness ruined my whole fruitfulness & growth, & I ended up staying in a hotel with the children, praying for the funds to leave the field & go back to Europe. Well, the funds never came & eventually I was able to move back into a Home. Miraculously the Lord began to work in my life & I was able to apologise to my mate & we came to a loving & united settlement of the children. To make a long story short, it was the Word & the love from the Family that brought me back to life. The Lord even saw fit to give me a very sweet & loving new mate, even though I didn't deserve her. I also want to share that I deserved whatever happened to me all those years because of my self-righteousness, & I really thank the Lord for delivering me. TYJ! PTL!