My Conclusion

Perhaps you'll pardon me if I write this letter in a more personal vein than usual. I want to tell you about some personal perceptions of mine, primarily because the Orwellian implications of The Family International's obiter dicta are clear. The nitty-gritty of what I'm about to write is this: The Family International's hypocrisy is transparent. Even the least discerning among us can see right through it. The problem with The Family International is not that it's amateurish. It's that it wants to heat the cauldron of terror until it boils over into our daily lives.

This seems so obvious, I am amazed there is even any discussion about it. In the course of my work, I regularly come in contact with feckless, shallow twits, and most of them also feel that my contempt for The Family International is boundless. And let me tell you, I am deliberately using colorful language in this letter. I am deliberately using provocative phrases that I hope will stick in the minds of my readers. I do ensure, however, that my words are always appropriate and accurate and clearly explain how I once had a nightmare in which The Family International was free to cashier anyone who tried to condemn its hypocrisy. When I awoke, I realized that this nightmare was frighteningly close to reality. For instance, The Family International claims that those who disagree with it should be cast into the outer darkness, should be shunned, should starve. That claim illustrates a serious reasoning fallacy, one that is pandemic in its reinterpretations of historic events. Then again, The Family International will probably respond to this letter just like it responds to all criticism. It will put me down as "pushy" or "self-satisfied". That's its standard answer to everyone who says or writes anything about it except the most fawning praise. The Family International is firmly convinced that sophomoric slimeballs and self-pitying, fickle nitwits should rule this country. Its belief is controverted, however, by the weight of the evidence indicating that The Family International's latest manifesto, like all the ones that preceded it, is a consummate anthology of disastrously bad writing teeming with misquotations and inaccuracies, an odyssey of anecdotes that are occasionally entertaining, but certainly not informative. The Family International can't attack my ideas, so it attacks itself. It could be worse, I suppose. It could make us the helpless puppets of our demographic labels.

A few years ago many people informed The Family International that its policy to excommunicate members who comply with mandatory child abuse reporting laws make it appear that its priority is to protect child molesters. The Family International said it'd "look further into the matter." Well, not too much further; after all, it is not interested in what is true and what is false or in what is good and what is evil. In fact, those distinctions have no meaning to it whatsoever. The only thing that has any meaning to The Family International is money. Why? The Family International doesn't want you to know the answer to that question.. I am convinced that there will be a strong effort on The Family International's part to promote simplistic answers to complex problems in the coming days. This effort will be disguised, of course. It will be cloaked in deceit, as such efforts always are. That's why I'm informing you that I have begged The Family International's associates to step forth and think outside the box. To date, only 325 people have agreed to help.. Are they worried about how The Family International might retaliate? You know the answer, don't you? You probably also know that I, hardheaded cynic that I am, want to focus on what unites rather than divides us.

We must hammer out solutions on the anvil of discourse. Only then can a society free of its ruthless declamations blossom forth from the roots of the past. And only then will people come to understand that we must indisputably reinvigorate our collective commitment to building and maintaining a sensitive, tolerant, and humane community. Does that sound extremist? Is it too scary for you? I'm sorry if it seems that way, but that's life. The Family International just keeps on saying, "We don't give a (expletive deleted) about you. We just want to ruin your entire day."

The first step: education.

Education alone is not enough, of course. We must also lend a helping hand. Philistinism-oriented and unruly, The Family International's snow jobs resemble a dilapidated shed. Kick in the door and the whole rotten structure will collapse.

The Family International's ultimata run on pure irony. Why is that relevant to this letter? Because if I had my druthers, The Family International would never have had the opportunity to exist. As it stands, The Family International says that society is screaming for its ideologies. But then it turns around and says that this is the best of all possible worlds and that it is the best of all possible organizations. You know, you can't have it both ways, The Family International. From a public-policy perspective, in order to solve the big problems with The Family International, we must first understand these problems, and to understand them, we must shelter initially unpopular truths from suppression, enabling them to ultimately win out through competition in the marketplace of ideas. A few days ago, The Family International actually admitted that it wants to inflict more death and destruction than the hordes of syphilitic rabid dogs in Mama's memory storage facility kennel. Can you believe that? An additional clue is that it periodically puts up a facade of reform. However, underneath the pretty surface, it's always business as usual.

If I recall correctly, we must remove our chains and move towards the light. It's easy to tell if The Family International's spokesperson is lying. If its lips are moving, it's lying. The Family International's circulars are a load of bunk. I use this delightfully pejorative term, "bunk" -- an alternative from the same page of my criminal-slang lexicon would serve just as well -- because The Family International claims that two wrongs make a right. I believe that the absurdities within that claim speak for themselves, although I should add that The Family International and its acolytes pay little or no attention to the negative impact that slavery will have on our daily lives. That's the current situation, and if you have any doubt about the reality of it, then you haven't been paying close enough attention to what's been happening in the world. The Family International's premise (that its perversions are all sweetness and light) is its morality disguised as pretended neutrality. The Family International uses this disguised morality to support its perversions, thereby making its argument self-refuting.

Make no mistake about it, when I was a child, Uncle Enoch told me, "You can unquestionably assume serious trouble is brewing when clueless misfits gag the innocent accused from protesting irrationalism-motivated persecutions." If you take enough acid, you might see his point. The Family International's perceptions are geared toward the continuation of social stratification under the rubric of "tradition". Funny, that was the same term that its cohorts once used to sucker us into buying a lot of junk we don't need. The Family International's spin doctors are an amalgamation of crude libertines, the most ribald present-day robber barons you'll ever see, and other self-serving parasites. Unfortunately, duplicitous louts who poke someone's eyes out make no effort to contend with the inevitable consequences of that action.

It may be coincidence that The Family International's expostulations drag men out of their beds in the dead of night and castrate them. It may be coincidence that they bombard us with an endless array of hate literature. And it may be coincidence that they create a world without history, without philosophy, without science, without reason -- a world without beauty of any kind, without art, without literature, without culture. But that's a lot of coincidence!

All of these things are related: anti-intellectualism, The Family International's solutions, and the general breakdown of our society. I'll even tell you how they're related. It's really very simple. In essence, The Family International's apparatchiks all look like The Family International, think like The Family International, act like The Family International, and deprive individuals of the right to follow knowledge like a sinking star beyond the utmost bound of human thought, just like The Family International does. And all this in the name of -- let me see if I can get their propaganda straight -- brotherhood and service. Ha! What does The Family International have to say about all of this? The answer, as expected, is nothing. The Family International's cat's-paws claim that The Family International acts in the public interest. I say to them, "Prove it" -- not that they'll be able to, of course, but because my dream is for tired eyes to open and see clearly, broken spirits to find new energy, and weary arms to find the strength to take away as many of The Family International's opportunities for mischief as possible.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't it true that The Family International has a unique faculty for wrecking people's lives? If The Family International's hariolations get any more pharisaical, I expect they'll grow legs and attack me in my sleep. I indeed assert that we should keep our priorities in check, and I have formalized my commitment to this high ideal by ensuring that I always advocate concrete action and specific quantifiable goals. Too many emotions to count raced through my mind when I first realized that the poisonous wine of obstructionism had been distilled long before The Family International entered the scene. The Family International is merely the agent decanting the poisonous fluid from its bottle into the jug that is world humanity. The Family International says it's going to create division in the name of diversity by the end of the decade. Is it out of its postmodernist mind? The answer is fairly obvious when you consider that some of us have an opportunity to come in contact with irresponsible grifters on a regular basis at work or in school. We, therefore, may be able to gain some insight into the way they think, into their values; we may be able to understand why they want to make excessive use of blasphemous language. Now that you've read this letter, let me challenge you, the reader, not just to help me tell The Family International where it can stick it, but also to educate others about what I've written.