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In Reply to: Re: My open letter to current and former FGA's posted by ray on February 24, 2005 at 18:47:39:
I have an opinion about all that is going on right now that I believe would be helpful and that is for anyone who is speaking that they use first person instead of generalize, such as saying "I was _________while in the family and I was wrong" instead of "WE were_________while in the family and WE were wrong". It means much more that way. Besides NO ONE speaks for EVERYONE here.
I further believe that being goal directed towards healing rather than categorical blame would go much further in raising funds and gaining support.
I did not join a sex cult. I was recruited into a cult before it was ever called a cult and before sex was a part of doctrine. The constant breakings, humiliations, purging sessions, tests of obedience, loyalty, the believing that God was real, something I didn't believe pre-COG, and being a teen myself and a woman did not put me in a power position. Not to mention that my "mate" that I was put together with in the Fam. and I were finally "allowed" to separate just after I got pg with my third child at the age of 21.
I don't think there is a full accounting of "Family history" for understanding to grow. Understanding does not mean that SGs cannot be validated by exers as to the accuracy of their claims. But we are also talking about people that have been out for some time and perhaps not had the chance to vent at the people who directly hurt them.
Sometimes the atmosphere of confession as a route to acceptance feels more like living in the Chinese Cultural Revolution or under the Khmer Rouge. Or being back in the Family. Yes SGs have every right to be angry. So do many FGs as exers.
