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In Reply to: Same old slippers, same old rice posted by Jules on January 07, 2005 at 17:44:44:
Jules, I have no personal issue with you. In fact, I do like you as a person, and I think you have done a great job with your site. Great actually does not even begin to cover it.
However, the "you people suck" and the largely blanket accusation directed at lame ass people who don't fucking do much about the devastation they have caused triggered one of my personal pissy moments. It takes one pissed off person to know one I guess.
If you say forgive me for the "you people" fine. Never mind.
I don't engage in squabbles on this board and am one of the least prolific posters. I have not attacked you over the years. I don't know where you get that. Maybe you think I am somebody else.
In reply to Refugee's post down below (a very thoughtful post that would deserve a long conversation) and in conversation with you I can suggest the following:
as far as what happened in TF the issue has been tackled so many times in so many different ways. The way I see it now after years can be very reductively summed up in this very insufficient formula, if a formula could ever be found.
1) The people who formulated and mandated policies are strongly responsible.
2) The parents and ex-members who obeyed and implemented those policies are personally responsible.
3) Whoever suffered abuse (untold numbers) can directly blame top leadership who mandated the policies, their own parents who implemented the policies AND the personal caretakers or anyone they were involved with directly who abused them and seek or demand some sort of direct contact, resolution, restitution, reconciliation if ever possible with THOSE specific people.
So the thing about "you people suck" is just not acceptable. I could come to your site and pick a poster who says something unfair or way over the top and say you people suck as well. You do have a trailer park for that reason. Every place has its own trash. I don't think THIS site has the corner on "sucking."
If I post on this site, even sporadically, and if I am an ex-member I will only take MY part of responsibility but no one else's. I don't know who the posters are that suggested your involvement on Thornwald's project but I am not sure they deserved the full treatment you gave them. It is ok, we all get angry and all have our bad evenings, me included.
I stand by my comment on individual parents and caretakers. They are first and foremost the people who should be the object of "generalized" and also personalized anger. It is way too easy to redirect that anger (too big to process I assume because it is terrible to be abused and neglected by your own parents, and I know that in first person) at people who have not personally hurt you. The discussion on the various degrees of responsibility of any given member at large could be a thread in itself, but I think that has been discussed a lot before and mostly unsuccessfully.
So, to conclude, happy new year to you, no bad feelings on my part as I don't have a personal issue with you, and thanks for taking back the "you people suck." I know it is one of your favorite expressions. =)
