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In Reply to: How angry are you on a scale of 1 to 10 ? posted by Jesse (rockon) on March 31, 2004 at 11:03:27:
I can see with your situation Jesse(rockon)...that I would have anger. You do have unresolved issues.
I on the other hand, I have to take some of the blame for returning to the family after reading "kehotek" and some other red flag warning signs and leaving. They somehow hooked me into rejoining...which I lived in Hell for another 4 years. The wasted time is what I regret most of all and the lies that I fed my soul. Although, I had been out of the family for years...some of the fear stuff kept within me.
I, think the biggest thing is to learn to forgive yourself. And then realize what a bunch of crap you believed in and try to work it out. Let's face it, some things we learned were truth or we certainly wouldn't have been deceived.
I'm pretty much healed over being in the family. I just look at it now as a learning experience. You have to look at yourself and congratulate yourself for not being still in there. Others, are still deluded, you aren't. Would you rejoin? More than likely you wouldn't, so you have learned.
I have a good book you might want to read. It's called "What to Do..When you Don't Know What to Do" by Cloud and Townsend. You might find it good reading.
My biggest problem after the family was low self esteem and not being able to discern who was a good person or who was a bad person. I read a book called "safe people" and "boundaries" by the same authors "Cloud and Townsend". It has helped heal me.
