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In Reply to: Details of SG Court Case in California posted by Anovagrrl on March 27, 2004 at 06:02:01:
First I want to say that when I first came on exer boards, I had been out of the family for a very long time. I had sort of set aside dealing with any of the past and I have reacted to what seems to be SG categorization of any and all FGs as being perps. in one way or another.
I don't believe this is categorically true, but certainly over time it is clear from reading your stories here that horrors occurred and worsened. I left around the time that there was plenty of lit out to suggest what was coming up around the corner with children, but SO MUCH MORE occurred than that which appeared to be on the way. It was the final straw for me when letters were coming out about "Marry Time" and "Child Brides" or something like that. At this point in my life I did not remember so much of what was written and could not absorb the letters any more except for certain pertinent parts. One of those was how when kids became 12 they should be considered adult, and that there was a push to go to India and start training schools where kids would go, and I left with my kids at a time when we were all together and the funds were there.
I have NO DOUBT whatsoever about the veracity of the accounts posted at MovingOn regarding SG experiences. Most people that are horribly abused tend to downplay the horror, having to distance themselves from it somewhat to come to terms with how bad it actually was.
I have posted at ex-family to SG's comments at times from a place of my own pain from both my family of origin and then the family. I am glad my kids did not have to experience the things others did that grew up in it and landed in combo's or with 'uncles and aunties'. These terms, 'uncles and aunties' did not exist when I left. Neither did combos or jumbos.
I am equally certain that the reason the family denies abuses and issues slaps on the hands of some of the most horrific of perpetrators is because Berg, Zerby and Family perps was/are pedophiles because they espouse the doctrines of Berg only creating charters and such to avoid prosecution. They clean up the outside appearance but inside is historically horrific.
I wish you all the best of luck in whatever ways you pursue to deal with this. I do think reporting it to the FBI and class action lawsuits are good ideas for those that take that route. I don't believe in forgiving people that are not sorry and in many cases are incapable of anything to do with being sorry outside of being caught.
Additionally I would say that even though this may harm the whole movement (the family), including some who others of you view as sincere people and family etc. that are still in, the abuses will never stop without significant intervention. That is why it is good that there are as many resources as possible for helping to whatever degree people want to or can, those who are leaving. The so-called 'system' has many resources that are a first step to help people facing dire life changes such as coming out of an abusive household or from extreme loss.
What people staying in the family face is continued abuse that is not only sexually abusive but severely spiritually (and I don't mean religion), emotionally and physically abusive as well.
I am sorry I did not have more presence of mind to report things that were happening via lit that had come out while in the familly, but as soon as I got out, I did speak out about it.
I am so very sorry for the pain some of you have experienced of having family members turn against you. That is such a deep and terribly painful betrayal.
I have had to develop family of choice for myself and had the betrayal and abuse of my family of origin. But I don't have to forgive my perps from that time period because they are not and never will be capable of being sorry. It is like pouring salt onto deep wounds to tell a person that has survived such abuse that they must some day forgive those people.
I hope for the success of all your endeavors.
