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In Reply to: This seems to be circular reasoning.. posted by tired of stones on February 06, 2004 at 14:13:05:
I'm sorry if my post seems confusing. Please do not take it personally. This isn't about you, it isn't about me, and it isn't about Anneke, per se. It's about a set of irrational beliefs underlying Family relationships that perpetuates and maintains a pattern of revictimization. If you feel like this line of discussion amounts to being molested, then it would be better not to read the rest of my post.
It was not my intention to pass judgement as to whether or not Anneke engaged in psychological intimidation and betrayal of trust. In an earlier post, I focused on the fact that one of the board coordinators claims this is what she did and has very clearly stated he was deeply hurt by Anneke's behavior. Whether or not he demands an apology or not, I have pointed out that there are certain steps involved in reconciliation. Admitting to having made a mistake is one of those steps, but not the only one.
I did not intend to imply that Anneke has financial connections with the Family. As I stated earlier, the post "What it is" is not about Anneke. It's about the faulty rationalization that goes around among Family members about what it means to take responsibility for one's behavior. I do not agree that I am asking for blood by pointing out that the reconciliation process requires the offender to acknowledge the pain s/he caused the victim.
I believe very strongly that many current and former Family members do not understand what is involved in the reconciliation process. This is largely because of the sociopathy Berg perpetrated and Karen Zerby continues to perpetrate. I also believe that a pattern of rationalizing, excusing, and defending an offender's behavior at the expense of the victim continues to go on among former Family members. This is What It Is.
I may very well be a judgemental, self-righteous, full-of-myself BS phoney who doesn't have a friggin' clue what she's saying, but drawing attention to that possibility won't change what is necessary to effect reconciliation, bring justice to the Family's victims, and put an end the ongoing pattern of revictimization.
As I said earlier, this isn't about me and it isn't about Anneke. It's about the victims and what they have said they want and need.
