Next time you have a bad day at work...

This is even funnier when you realize it's a real story! Next time you
have a bad day at work, think of this guy.

Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He
performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an
E-mail he
sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2 on FM dial
in
Ft. Wayne, Indiana, who was sponsoring a
worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.

Hi Sue,

Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.
Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling
down
lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make
you
realize it's not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened
to
me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you
know,
my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office.
It's
a wetsuit.

This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm
is
this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000
piece
of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a
delightful
temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose,
which
is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and
I've
used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the
bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back
of my
wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working
in a
Jacuzzi.
Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to
itch.
So, of course, I
scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my butt
started to burn. I
pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I
realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a
jellyfish
and pumped it into my suit.

Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't
stick to
it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I
scratched
what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into
the
crack of my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my
dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to
the fact
that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.

Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three
agonizing
in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I
could
reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I
arrived at
the surface, I was wearing nothing
but my brass helmet..As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with
tears of
laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me
to rub
it on my butt as
soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I
couldn't
poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.

So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much
worse it
would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.

Now repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job".