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In Reply to: Re: Maria and Peter's apology - don't they get it? posted by anovagrrl on December 01, 2003 at 11:34:44:
Hey, I agree that there is a good side to guilt and shame. There are times when it is absolutely appropriate to feel them. This letter is specifically referring to the SG's who confronted their parents for things that their parents need to be confronted about. My post to you that we discussed was about not being collectively guilty as FGs for what occurred to SGs. There were many FGs that left or that battled it to the best of their ability within the family as well as having dire consequences for it.
But more immediately, I certainly feel it was absolutely appropriate for SGs to write their parents and confront them. The sad part is that until those parent (or unless those parents) get out of the family, they will most likely be unable to deal with the facts. Look at the efforts on Maria's part to blame the SGs for what happened to them and to call them of the enemy etc for being rightfully angry. What hell for all involved.
The thing that is so twisted about the family is that there are FGs who have done horrific things that went against any of their natural desires due to the influence of the nature of the beast. (the family.) Some have committed suicide over it. Then there are some that get off to it because it is in their nature. Those are the ones, imo, that need to be prosecuted. But of course, the ones whos hands the matter should be in is those directly involved. In this case the SGs. It is for them to decide how to proceed against the family, their parents etc, in whatever fashion they choose to. I hope that any endeavoring to take action or who are engaging in confrontation will consult with a supportive professional because it is an emotional powder keg to deal with. It is not often that a person being confronted validates the people who have been hurt. And the responses, like Maria's letter, are often inflammatory at best.
