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In Reply to: Re: Confidentiality posted by Sam Ajemian on August 28, 2003 at 21:35:52:
Thanks for explaining Sam. Well, I'm not an expert on what to do in such a case either. If an SG confided sexual abuse they had suffered and asked me not to share it, frankly, I'd probably abide by their wishes. Come to think of it, I actually have had an SG confide how he was sexually "initiated" at a young age but he is not going to press charges (if he could even find the person) and has decided that life is too short and to get on with his life, and he's actually doing great now. Anyway, I don't feel it's my business to report it to the authorities in some foreign nation halfway around the world, whose language I don't even speak, where the incident happened. He wouldn't get justice and would only be re-traumatized.
OK, and here's another example I just thought of, and you tell me what you think. My younger brother was homosexually molested as a 10 year old boy, and the molester actually molested several other young boys around the same time (or so I've heard). Now, the molester lives in a city not too far from where my younger brother lives, and I know that my brother is still suffering from the experience, BUT.....
Though I've asked him about it, he refuses to seek out the offender either to press charges or even to face down the man to demand an apology. I have burned with anger for my brother at times and wish he'd go after the guy. I've thought of advertising the guy's name and trying to stir up a multi-party suit. But my brother won't initiate any action. Not for lack of courage as he's a gutsy guy, but the fact that he has an entire life now and a beautiful family and kids and the price tag for going after the guy would be higher than the satisfaction of justice done. And since he won't do anything, and would be extremely upset if I took matters into my own hands and did a little vigilante justice, I haven't done anything. Sometimes I wonder if I'm more upset about it than he is. The day he decides to do something I'll back him, but till then I back his decision too.
