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In Reply to: Re: Let's look at other solutions posted by MG on December 05, 2002 at 16:25:47:
Good to hear your take on things, MG. I always enjoy your posts, BTW.
I agree that my take is a little b/w, and I understand the dynamics of being trapped, feeling no place to go, and staying in the group from a sense of survival. Been there, done that. But at some point I knew that I could not go on, and for many months after that I was working my way, at least in my mind, to leaving.
How many people in the group are working their way towards leaving?
I just don't think its good enough to say nothing.
I don't demonize individuals as such, but in many months of reflection I have come to the conclusion that if everyone took a little more responsibility and accountability for their actions, some fundamental things would change. I can't go down the brainwashed road too far, because that's saying I had no choice. The fact is, I don't see myself as a victim so much as the thousands of young people raised in the group. they are the victims. I was just a stupid jerk who stayed in a group long after I knew I should have left. And in the process, I did harm to many of those young people, just by sending in my tithes. I have to take responsibility for my choices.
Anyway, I'm rambling. I see this discussion as a process, a chance for us all to consider different points of view and try to make sense of it all. Each of us will probably have a slightly different take on things, depending on the location from which we speak, our experiences, how long we have been out, and a myriad of other factors. I think this particular debate is helpful, insightful, and I enjoy reading the posts.
I think I have figured out where I stand -- more or less -- for now.
So thanks for the dialogue. Your posts are thought-provoking.