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In Reply to: Re: Dreams posted by Karen on November 15, 2002 at 21:44:36:
You said, "I do have some recurring dreams sometimes from when we lived in Greece. We are still in touch with some dear exmember Greek nationals in one city, and many times I wake up in the middle of a dream, dreaming that we are visiting there and trying to find them or look them up, but we are never quite able to do it. We always just miss them somehow, and I wake up feeling broken-hearted. I wonder what that means - any ideas?"
The first thing I get from this is the most obvious -- that these people are very important to you and that you'd love to visit them. But they're far away in Greece and even the thought of ever going all the wy to Greece is hard & frustrating. You describe yoruself as brokenhearted so I'm wondering if this is your continued mourning over how the Family destroyed friendships, broke up loved ones and sent children away. Maybe deep down inside you still have residual fear tha thte Family is still there & able to frustrate your contact with loved ones.
Your other dream about yoru present jobbrings out a bit more:
"I dream that either an employee has called in sick or that patients have cancelled their visits, and then I wake up in a cold sweat because I'm not sure if it's real or a dream. Why does our psyche always want something to worry about?"
I think this shows that you are a very careful diligent person who's always picking up after other people and picking up their slack & you don't like it when they disappoint you. You don't like chaos, you like things ordered and under control. But the Family introduced totall chaos into your life and so now you have this residual feelings that even your very best efforts will never be good enough & will never bring order into life.
That's proably why you also dream about being in a Famly home and frustrated you can't live up to their expectations. That's the climate they created and it goes deeply against the grain of your personality, and my guess is that you feel that if you do your best (and even a bit more than you should) that all your diligence should pay off and create happiness and order. But all that "you can never measure up" thinking and "all your best efforts will never be able to override the chaos we are determined to create" and "we will take the most precious things from you, your loved ones" are still fears you have fromthe Family.
You sound like a great person, doing your best to be faithful, organized and ordered. I bet your house is very neat all the time. ha.
