I grew up in the F.

I was thinking about this yesterday. I was thinking how I joined at 21 and had been on my own since 18, kind of wandering around feeling very lost. I really had not grown up and had a lot of growing up to do. I have met many exmembers who joined even younger. Someone below joined at 17! We were young and we really grew up in the F. Who was our father to lead us to maturity? that was Berg, unfortunately. when I look at my own children who enter college and start living life on their own, they have a lot to learn. It's all new for them. They call me and ask me so many little things.

When I joined, I never knew how to balance a checkbook, pay the bills, earn an income, fill out tax forms, so many little things that I see my kids going through now and how going to college, living on their own, etc., is growing them up, little by little. You don't grow up at 18 when you move out. You need direction and guidance, I see that in my kids. Unfortunately, I didn't have a happy home life so I didn't depend on my family for the support and direction I needed. My father had become incapacitated when I was 16 and my mother was turned into his caregiver.

When I joined the F., I automatically took them on as my parents, my mentors. Those years that I was supposed to be maturing and growing up were spent in the F. I never grew up there, we were kept like children and dependent on "mommy" and "daddy." To think they even so blatantly use those terms.

When I see older F. members today, it's like they never grew up and are still stuck in some time warp. They can't make any independent decisions and have no clue how to manage their life outside of their cult environment. I'm just happy I left and grew up. It's a great feeling.