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In Reply to: Thats the whole point posted by Exer on October 17, 2002 at 17:40:19:
I agree. And I think that knowledge comes first before the feelings start factoring in, for me anyway. It is similar to the way a battered woman might get therapy but take the knowledge and stay in it for some time before finally making the break. Then it is possible for them to get back into a similar situation because of a lack of support system to utilize that knowledge. This whole recovery thing, imo is a process and is not instantaneous. After so much degradation and abuse in the family, I might know of ten things that I can change, but only handle two at first. If I can learn to give myself credit for what I have accomplished versus dogging myself for what is yet undone, I have a better shot at success. That is what I believe, anyway. I feel no affection or desire to look back at the family with desire for the f'ed up ole days. But I am affected by years and years in it and all the losses. That is what I mean by recovery. Looking at, identifying losses, with people who have been there and done that; then listening to what has helped others and applying what fits for me. Am I writing more clearly now?
