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In Reply to: relationships posted by NOT Ann Landers on September 18, 2002 at 08:13:02:
and you know, it's hard to give blanket advice (no pun intended) to people because were all different personalities and handle things differently. and another thing is that if you don't know all the facts, how can you advise them. I think a big thing is simply 'being there' for the person going through it and letting them know you care.
look at how much crap each of us went through in the Family with relationships and having marriages bust up or being forced to share. We're all deep waters and understand when someone's going through it. I mean, if we know enough about the situation we really can advise.
Some of us I think have been through so many onenight stands and broken relationships we figure that now that we're out and have our heads on straighter, that we'll finally get it right and stick with our pick. That's the ideal cause that brings healing, having someone there for you.
but life is life and the Family was only an exaggeration of the trials that beset normal people in the real world. Just cause we're out now doesn't mean we'll have perfectly wonderful relationships or nail it the first time.
It's hard enuf for systemites (Agggh! Did I use that word??) to deal with breakup, betrayal and emotional pain. Only when we deal with that kind of thing, we have 10-15-20 years of baggage to mentally refer back to. We can't help it. it's a big part of who we are.
I don't know if I said anything sensible or was just rambling.
