The Good Samaritan -- Revisited

A Family couple, Josiah and Mary Davidflame and 2 of their 8 children are out provisioning in their brand new 10-seater van. Josiah Davidflame is the shepherd of the BigCity Home and has power, money and lots of savings. His 17-year old daughter, Mercy and 6-year old son, Paulie, are along for PR purposes.

Josiah: Wow! What a haul we got! This stuff must be worth $10,000!

Mary: Yes, and it's all ours. Thank God we got this contact before the other Homes in the city got it.

Josiah: (chuckling) Well, we scooped 80% of the malls as part of our turf. Who says a little Godly greed doesn't go a long way?

Teen Mercy: I wish we could share this with the other Homes. There are some really needy--

Josiah: Don't start that again! God gave it to us! We tithe it to WS, don't we? What? You want us to give it to other Homes who don't deserve it?

Mercy: Doesn't the Bible say, "He who does not care for his own is worse than an infidel?" Doesn't it say, "Do good as often as you can, especially to the household of faith." What about Acts 2:44-45?

Josiah: Mary, I'm driving, can you puh-leeeese explain to our doubting daughter that all that went bye-bye when the Charter came out. From now on, it's every Home on it's own.

Mary: Mercy, ever since the Charter came out....

Mercy: I know mom, I've heard it all before.

Josiah: WHOAAAAAAH! What was that? Stupid kid! Get out of the road! I nearly hit you! (Josiah pulls over to yell at a teenage girl pushing a baby in a stroller.) What the hell you doing on the road?

Girl: So-so-sorrry, mister. I just got evicted from my apartment. I'm not quite myself.

Josiah: Well, stay off the road!

Girl: (seeing the brand new van and well-dressed Family members) Mister, could you help with a few dollars? My baby and me got no money. I don't have food and I don't know where we'll stay tonight.

Mercy: Oh dad, yes, please help her!

6-year old Paulie: Oh dad! We can be like the Good Samaritan!

Josiah: No way! No. No. No.

Mary: Where did you hear about the Good Samaritan, Paulie?

Paulie: Mercy read me the Bible story....

Mary: MERCY!!! You know we're not supposed to read the Bible any more! Only Mama and Peter letters.

Mercy: Dad, we gotta help her! Look at that poor little kid. If Grandpa was alive, wouldn't he help her? Didn't he give to beggars?

Josiah: Grandpa talked a LOT about not giving God's money away to systemites! Don't you remember when my own mother lost her job and the Folks refused to let us help her with even one dollar?

Mercy: Yes, but....then couldn't we take her home with us? Just tonight? Then help her find a place?

Josiah: That's out of the question! She's a systemite. We can't have her in our Heavenly Home! Don't you know how much Dad taught us about security? Dad NEVER allowed any Homes to EVER take in systemites who needed a place to stay, no matter how great their need was. Security, security, security!

Mercy: Oh....yeah....I forgot....

Josiah: Let the church people help her. They have nothing better to do anyways, since they're not serving God like we are 110%.

Mercy: But doesn't that make us just like the Levite and the priests who pass the poor man on the Jericho road because they were too religious and "serving God"?

Josiah: Wait! what are you doing?

Mercy: I'm getting out of the van. I'm going to leave the Family because it's one big hypocritical crock of shit! I'm going to help the poor.

Josiah: You can't do that! You're only 17.

Mercy: Try stopping me.

Josiah: Fine! If you want to leave, be a backslider. Just take the money out of your purse and give it to me first.

Mercy: That's my money. I worked for it.

Josiah: It's God's money, and since you're now a backslider, it's no longer yours. Give it to me.

Mercy: But what will I have?

Josiah: That's your problem if you backslide.

Mercy: But I'm your daughter.

Josiah: I could quote you a dozen Mo-quotes proving that you're not even my family if you backslide.

SLLAAAAAAAAM!

Josiah: Hey! Come back! Give me that money! Hey!

Paulie: Daddy, is Mercy being a Good Samaritan?

Josiah: NO! SHE'S A BACKSLIDER!!! WE'RE THE GOOD SAMARITANS! WE'RE THE ONLY ONES SERVING GOD JUST LIKE GRANDPA TAUGHT US!!